Chapter 48

• I don't know how many minutes I was in my office. Hiring me as the architect of the house, being invited to the engagement party, strange looks from Agustine's mother—all of that is a puzzle to me. The weight of it pressed on my chest like a storm cloud, making it hard to think clearly. I ran my fingers through my hair and exhaled slowly, feeling the tension knot in my shoulders. Every scenario that had just occurred replayed in my mind, each one more confusing than the last. Why would they involve me in this way? Was it really about business, or was there another agenda I couldn’t see? I couldn’t stop my thoughts from spiraling, the questions bouncing around like a relentless storm inside my head.
• They are not terribly ill, right? I shook the thought away. Of course, there was no sign of illness, and yet, for some reason, my heart couldn’t stop imagining the worst. Maybe it was the past catching up with me, the memories of how everything had been tangled with Agustine years ago. I pressed my hands to my temples, trying to massage away the unease. It wasn’t just worry about health—it was about the intentions, about whether I could trust the people who now stood at the edge of my carefully constructed life. My eyes landed on the stack of papers still on my desk, contracts, plans, designs, reminders of the work I was supposed to focus on, yet I couldn’t muster the energy to pick them up. The office suddenly felt suffocating, as if it were shrinking around me.
• In the end I let out a sigh and then put my things away. I intend to go to the old apartment I lived in; I hope that the owner will sell it to me. If my plan doesn't work out, I have no other choice but to find a condo unit for us. The thought made my chest tighten—how would the twins adjust to another small space? Would they feel trapped or restless? I ran through the possible arrangements in my mind: where their toys would go, how I could create more storage, how to make a cozy little corner for them to feel safe. The practical side of me clashed with the emotional side, which was quietly panicking over the impossibility of it all. I had to be strategic; I had to be careful, but above all, I had to be quick.