Chapter 3 Heart Broken

• I grip my chest from the sheer amount of pain that Jace’s words inflict upon my heart. Tears run down the corners of my eyes and I look at him with my mouth agape as he walks out of the room without giving me a second look.
• Something I haven’t been able to do? Why would he even say such cruel and demeaning words to me?
• Why is he making it seem like I had a say in whether the kids live or die? If I didn’t want to give him kids, would I keep getting pregnant despite stillbirth after stillbirth?
• Does he have any idea how hard it is for a woman to go through all the stages of pregnancy three times and not even get to see the face of her child?
• In my sorrow and grief, the next morning I went to the temple.
• I kneel at the base of the moon goddess’ altar in the temple, a statue of a woman with the moon for a crown, flanked by two wolves.
• I place a candle in front of me and light it. A tribute to the soul of my dead child, who did not even get to take its first breath in the world.
• I sigh sadly with a heart too heavy for me to carry, and a teardrop falls from my eyes, quenching the light of the candle. I sniff hard, throwing my head up to prevent a torrent from falling, the pain in my heart just too much for me to bear.
• I remember coming to the temple almost every day when I was pregnant to give offerings, to pray that this child would live, that this time would be different, but it seems it has become even worse.
• Not only did I lose my child, I’m also going to lose my husband, my home, my family.
• Why am I even here?
• Does the goddess even hear my prayers? Are my offerings accepted? Does she care about my pain?
• “Look at her,” the disgusted sound of a female voice reaches my ear where I’m reeling in my grief, “when is she going to give up and accept that she is cursed?”
• The harsh words slash my heart and I tilt my head to see two temple attendants in the far corner, oblivious of the fact that as the child of an Alpha, I have a superior hearing ability and I can hear them all too clearly.
• The second one scoffs, “I bet she is praying for another child, another poor baby to kill.”
• Both women chuckle in mockery and the first one replies, “it is a good thing the Alpha brought his mate who already had a child for him. Imagine being stuck with this cursed woman for a Luna, he would have had to step down at the end of the next moon cycle, I’m happy for him.”
• I purse my lip tight, deeply hurt by the conversation of the women. My own subjects are now calling me cursed, and it is not the first time I’m hearing it.
• ‘The Cursed Luna’, that is their secret title for me.
• Does Jace think the same of me, that I’m cursed? That I will never be able to give him a living child?
• Is that why he brought back Alina?
• Even if he claims that Alina found him on her own, I find that part of his story hard to believe, especially since he is so conveniently planning to marry Alina.
• “No! Please!”
• The piercing scream of one of the women jolts me back to reality and I snap my head in their direction, only to see them being pulled forward by two warriors. But it is the man behind them that catches my attention.
• Beta Jeremy Maddox, the red wolf of Moon Storm, Jace’s elder and fraternal twin brother.
• While Jace is built like an athlete, lean and muscular with blonde hair and blue eyes, Jeremy is huge, also muscular with hair and eyes as dark as the night.
• “Please, we did nothing wrong,” one of the women pleads as the warriors throw them at my feet.
• I turn from them with a confused look to Jeremy, who smirks at me and bows slightly.
• “Luna, these runts saw it fit to say inappropriate words about you. Pass your judgment, my sword will be swift,” he says in his rich baritone voice, his tone icy.
• Realization quickly dawns on me. Jeremy must have been close by and also heard them. I look down at the women who are absolutely petrified, pleading with me in tears, before looking back at Jeremy.
• “My judgment is mercy,” I reply.
• It is not their fault that I have had three still births in four years. For all I know, they may be right, and I may indeed be cursed. There is hardly any other explanation for my predicament.
• “Mercy it is,” Jeremy smirks at me, before turning to his men and giving his order, “cut off their tongues.”
• My eyes bulge as the men drag the wailing women away. “I said mer—”
• “Mercy is taking their tongues, their heads would have been more appropriate,” Jeremy cuts me off in a cold tone, before taking the matchbox from me and lighting the candle that my tears had put out.
• “I hear my brother is taking another Luna and the council also approves,” he says, staring into the flickering flame.
• I heave a deep sigh, reminded that soon I will be out of my home.
• “He is,” I reply in a low tone.
• “And you’re just going to let that happen?” Jeremy turns to me, his brows quirked up in a frown, “the Alpha blood flows in your veins, not his. He is only Alpha because you are his Luna.”
• I look away from Jeremy’s cold eyes, knowing the truth of his words but feeling helpless to it.
• What would he have me do?
• My father passed on the Alpha authority to Jace and not me, so whether he has Alpha blood or not, he is the Alpha and with my father dead, there is no chip on Jace’s shoulder to make him keep me, he can do as he pleases.
• And then there is the issue of the standing law that if an Alpha stays in power for five whole moon cycles without an heir, he has to step down and pass on the position to his Beta.
• Four moon cycles have already passed since I married Jace, an equivalent of four calendar years.
• I have to see things from Jace’s perspective, no matter how much it hurts me. Claiming Alina and her child will secure his legacy as Alpha, his future, even if I am the sacrifice that has to be made.
• “I can take care of your problem for you if you want,” Jeremy says in a serious tone, forcing me to look back at him with squinted eyes.
• “Take care of my problem, how?”
• “Don’t act naive, Sheila. You have a problem, this woman, and I can take care of it for you, just say the word,” Jeremy replies, staring straight into my eyes and slashing his thumb across his neck in an imitation of violence.