Chapter 3 The Stubborn Alpha

• Diana’s mouth ran dry, and her tongue refused to cooperate with her, leaving her gaping at Alistair like a fish.
• ‘Oh my god… The novel did him no justice.’
• Alistair stood by the door, looking so tall and imposing with his broad shoulders and long legs. His body was packed with muscles, which he most likely earned from mastering the Moonfyrean combat style and fighting any threat that dared to come to his territory.
• His hair was as dark as a lightless night, thick and shiny but slightly untamed. His nose was straight and in perfect harmony with the shape of his eyes that had a beautiful and gentle shade of blue. His brows were as quite thick and almost untamed as his hair and were positively tilted, and the lines of his jaws were sharply visible and attractive.
• It didn’t take long before Diana concluded that Alistair was a walking wet dream and a sex god living among mortals.
• ‘He really is a main character material…’
• Diana swallowed. Luckily, she found some shame in her bones and snapped her mouth shut. She pried her gaze away from Alistair and doggedly stared at the floor instead, as though it was more pleasant to the eyes than his gorgeous face.
• ‘God, I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a perfect face before…’
• Alistair didn’t seem to like being left hanging without an answer. He walked into the room, carelessly closing the door without so much of a glance at it. He then asked Diana once more. “I asked you, Yana… What did you just say?”
• Diana bit her lower lip.
• Yana was the affectionate nickname Alistair used for his mate. For his Diana.
• But the Diana in front of him was a different Diana. Just someone borrowing the face of his mate.
• Guilt began to take form in Diana’s head. To be called by a nickname he made from his mate’s name, reserved for her and only her, didn’t feel right.
• ‘Breaking the bond is really the right thing to do.’
• Diana hardened her resolve and finally lifted her eyes to meet Alistair’s piercing ones. She heaved a deep breath and firmly said, “You know what I said, Alistair. You didn’t mishear anything.”
• Several big strides were all it took for Alistair to reduce the distance between them. Diana could hardly breath in his presence, and panic flared inside her, remembering the parchments she had filled with her notes and lists. She couldn’t let Alistair see it, so she angled her body completely towards him to hide the parchments away from his view.
• “You cannot mean it, Yana.”
• Diana flinched at the use of the nickname again. “Please don’t call me that.”
• “Why are you…” Alistair took another step toward Diana and lifted a hand, seemingly wanting to touch her. But he ended up closing his hand into a tight fist before dropping it back to his side. “Why are you acting so differently all of a sudden?”
• “I just want to break our bond and be away from you. I don’t want to stay here in Moonfyre anymore.”
• “You don’t mean that, Yana.”
• “I said do not call me that.”
• The flash of hurt that crossed Alistair’s face was unmistakable, and it twisted a tight knot in Diana’s chest. It was probably her guilt, growing and consuming her the longer they talk to each other.
• Alistair didn’t deserve this. At all. To his eyes, she was still his Diana. But she knew she wasn’t, and while it wasn’t fair to deceive him, it wasn’t also fair to be so cold and mean when she was about to break a perfectly good relationship and his perfectly intact heart.
• Diana’s tongue darted out and swiped on her lips for a quick second. She then added, “Please. Don’t call me that anymore, Alistair.”
• Alistair stared at her with a certain intensity Diana was quite sure would melt her. His gaze traveled from her face, then down to her torso and legs, before moving up again to meet her eyes. It was as if he was drinking in the sight of her in a calculative manner, gauging the weight of her words and the intention behind them.
• Diana found it a little bit unnerving, and it drove her into self-consciousness. So it almost came as a knee-jerk reaction for Diana to straighten her posture and tilt her head in a confident and mildly defiant manner.
• ‘Does he see right through my act? Has he figured out that I am an impostor?’
• Diana wetted her lips with her tongue once more. This time, Alistair seemed to follow the little movement with a certain glint in his eyes.
• “Alright,” he finally conceded. “Fine. I’ll call you Diana then… But we will not sever our bond. Not now. Not ever.”
• A tired and slightly exasperated huff of breath erupted from Diana. “Alistair, please don’t make this any more difficult for us. Let’s just break our bond and quietly part ways.”
• “Why?” Alistair asked, crossing his arms against his chest. “Make me understand, Diana. Do you not want me anymore?”
• Diana almost laughed bitterly at the question as she thought, ‘There is no one in any world in any universe who wouldn’t want you… But I don’t want to die, especially when I just got here. And I surely do not want to deceive you. You deserve better than that.’
• Her silence must’ve dragged longer than Alistair appreciated because he spoke again to prod for a reason. “Tell me why. Don’t I get an explanation for this? I think I deserve one, Diana.”
• “I…” Diana began to say, but she couldn’t quite find the next words to say. She wasn’t entirely ready for this confrontation. She thought she could have a day or two to mull over everything and prepare a proper foolproof course of action. She hadn’t expected Alistair to walk in on her and hear her talk to herself about severing her bond with him. The chances of it happening had totally slipped out of her mind.
• “You what? Go on. I’m listening.”
• “I just want to,” Diana finally said, unable to formulate any other acceptable answer. “Isn’t that enough?”
• “No. It’s not enough. It’s far from enough, Diana. It isn’t fair. You’re not being fair.”
• ‘I know,’ Diana agreed, but she bit her lower lip, unwilling to let it slip past.
• Diana didn’t ask to be hit by bus in one ordinary morning and be transmigrated into this fictional world. She didn’t ask to be Diana Claremont-Blackwell. She didn’t ask for any of this. And yet, here she was, trying to make sense of everything while being overwhelmed by her new reality and by the fact that she would be killed soon.
• She tried so hard to rein in her emotions, to keep her composure and figure things out. But she was close to bursting at the seams. A sting began to brew behind her eyes, and tears quickly filled her vision.
• Alistair didn’t seem to notice, or he simply didn’t care while being in the midst of his own confusion and hurt. So he went on talking, his voice taking on a stern tone and loud volume. “We will not break our bond. We are to stay mated, and that is final!”
• His resolute and fierce declaration was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and Diana snapped. So words came tumbling out of her mouth before she could logically decide against them.
• “Can’t you just let me go?!”
• The first of her tears chose that moment to roll down her cheek. The rest then followed, falling in rivulets on her face, and the sight of her crying stunned Alistair into silence. But what she said next painted a bewildered and slightly panicked look on his face.
• “I don’t want to die, Alistair!”
• His eyes widened, and his lips parted ever so slightly in shock.
• “I will be killed if I stay here with you…” Diana said weakly, already regretting her unsightly and unbecoming outburst. As silently as she could, she sniffled. Then as she wiped the wetness on her cheeks with the back of her hand, she pleaded softly, “So just let me go. Please…”
• Any hesitance that Alistair seemed to have about touching her disappeared. His hand circled her wrist, and he then gently pulled her closer to him.
• Diana should not have let him do so, but she did. She didn't even make an attempt to protest when he snaked his arms around her. She let him hold her in a comforting embrace that was so secure yet also so delicate in the same breath. Maybe it was because she really needed a hug at that moment. Or maybe it was because there was something so safe and warm about his touch that Diana couldn’t say no to. His warmth even permeated through the fitted black top he was donning.
• “What do you mean, Diana? Explain it to me. I need to understand. Why do you think you’re going to get killed?”
• ‘Crap! What do I say?’
• Diana pulled away from Alistair, and she immediately felt bereft over the loss of his warmth and his comforting scent of clary sage with a hint of something else she couldn’t exactly name. Regardless, Diana found it musky and spicy yet also fresh and mildly floral at the same time, and she knew to herself that she would never get sick of such a soothing scent that told her of warmness, kindness and security.
• “Diana,” Alistair said cautiously in a low voice, as though he thought Diana would break if he made his voice just a tad bit louder. “Talk to me.”
• “I just…” Diana couldn’t bear to look at his eyes as she lied, “It’s just dreams. I’ve been having them for weeks now. They’re very vivid, and they always seem real. And I just know they’re not simple dreams. I’m going to be killed here, Alistair. In this very room. With a dagger.”
• Alistair took a step back away from her. His jerky reaction pulled Diana’s attention back to his face, which had grown completely ashen.
• Her breath hitched slightly at the way he looked at her as if she had just served him his worst nightmare on a golden platter. And maybe she did. To lose a mate was a pain that rendered one’s heart in pieces, and in the book, it had led Alistair to his descent to a bottomless pit of grief and anger. Of course, Serena gradually changed all that when she came into the picture.
• Alistair continued to look so shaken that Diana felt the urge to return the comfort he had given her just moments ago. But she held herself back.
• “A-Alistair?”
• The sound of his name snapped him out of whatever storm was brewing in his mind. The look on his face was gone in a heartbeat, and he regained a tight rein over his composure as if his own thoughts and emotions hadn’t rushed to the surface and overtaken him just a moment ago.
• “I see.”
• Diana studied his handsome face, but she found not a single tinge of emotion left. Not even in his deep and beautifully blue eyes.
• She had slightly expected her claims to be met with skepticism, but Alistair didn’t seem to have any to give her. He didn’t wave her off and dismissed everything she said as just a little folly or a product of her overthinking mind like she had thought he would. Instead, he circled back to the matter that seemed to be the more important one for him.
• “And you think breaking your bond with me is the solution? That being a free wolf would vanquish all threats?”
• It sounded quite foolish now to Diana after hearing him say it out loud, shaped in his perspective. But she chose to double down on her decision just for the sake of her pride and what she thought was right.
• “Yes, because I’m not safe here with you, and…”
• “I disagree,” Alistair interjected. “So you can cry all you want, but I refuse to give you what you want. You can just think of something else to ask from me.”
• “And what? Am I just to wait here for my murderer to end me?”
• “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. Let your mate handle it from here.”
• Alistair’s tone rang with finality, leaving Diana with no room to argue her case. But he did give her a certain look with one eyebrow raised as if he was challenging her to make one more objection. Diana had an inkling he had every intention to either disregard or outright reject another appeal to break their bond. So she didn’t make an effort anymore.
• A moment of silence passed between them, and something akin to smug satisfaction flitted across his face. But it was gone a little too soon before she could be sure if she saw it correctly.
• Alistair then turned around to leave, but he paused mid-step to say, “I will see you at dinner in an hour. Be sure to make yourself a little bit more dressed than you are now.”
• Diana fought the groan threatening to leave her mouth and the childish urge to flip her middle finger at his back as he made his exit from the room.