Chapter 101 Cristiano

• Nevio is waiting for me by the door. Our house which is now fully renovated makes me a little happy. We had people working day and night to restore it because I was excited to add a nursery. For our child who is now no more. But it's still my house. I can't find it in me to hate it especially now that it has all the fucking memories of her. She's lying half-dead in a hospital. The doctors say it's a waiting game that only she can end by waking up.
• Half of me wishes she could sleep forever so I don't ever have to look into her eyes again. I've imagined what will happen when she wakes up and finds out the baby is gone. I know she'll be sad because both of us were looking forward to being parents. I had finally managed to make her understand that no matter what happened I would be there for her and the baby. That I wouldn't abandon them. And then this happens.
• I hate her. I hate myself. I hate my mother for doing this to me and I hate knowing that I deserve everything happening to me. This is punishment for the things I've done and those I'm yet to do. God is punishing me by taking away everything that made me happy. Because men like us don't deserve it. Lombardi's spawn deserve even less. I should end his lineage here. This world doesn't need more of his blood to taint it. They're better off without us.