Chapter 116

• "Unfortunately, I did," he replied, a hint of anguish in his tone. "Maybe not in the way they portrayed it, but I was complicit. Steve was too – as were Connor, Victoria, and hundreds of others. We were all handpicked while we were still in high school, just kids who thought they had nothing to lose. But then, day by day, we learned the painful truth: we had so much to lose. Pride was dismissed; there was no place for honor or integrity when we were following orders for acts of horror. Sincerity and empathy were met with punishment. We entered as good people but left having witnessed and participated in the most monstrous deeds imaginable. We emerged as murderers. Some of us even became victims ourselves, marred by the punishment that followed our initial failures."
• "You were all victims, manipulated into becoming what my father wanted you to be. You were controlled by the hands of a truly monstrous being," I said, my heart heavy with the weight of his words.
• "None of us will ever be okay again. Steve and I try to stay in touch with some of the others. We are the monsters now; many of us struggle with depression or suicidal thoughts. One of our brothers has completely vanished, disconnected from the world. Our sisters are unable to bond, haunted by the horrors they've seen. We can't escape the flashbacks from the smallest triggers, or the nightmares that invade our sleep. Above all, we are burdened with guilt and shame, ashamed of who we have become."