Chapter 81 Mine And All Yours

• I D R I S
• After reading through Texas’ diary for me page after page, Sage was supporting me as I sobbed on his thighs and rubbed the back of my head with his palm. I was unable to finish reading it all, let alone the last few pages before he committed suicide. Hell, I was unable to even start without holding Sage's hand to comfort me. In his notebook, he repeatedly expressed his love and longing for me, he admitted that he had planned out every detail of his death. He wrote down and talked about how he did his best to ignore the voices in his head but ultimately gave into them and committed suicide because he thought it was the only way to end his agony and to stop the voices.
• Without disclosing anything to anybody, he fought against everything all alone. He dealt with all of the guilt, grief, and loneliness by himself, relied heavily on drugs and consumed alcohol on a daily basis which deteriorated himself even more, and continuously pretended to be fine, singing and performing for his fans as he had lost his sense of passion and love for music, and informing everyone that he was ready to move on while he was anything but to himself and everyone around him. He held every single hurt and dark feeling all inside of him and was self-destructive on most days.