I had little to no money left after I took a taxi and went to the ER.
Left with no choice but to call Ho Cong, I grumbled in exhaustion and disdain. I was not so noble as to not use him whenever the situation called for it. After all, he was the one that got me here in the first place.
He immediately drove to the hospital to pick me up.
His left cheek was marred with slight bruises left by the five fingers that I struck him with back at noon.
I sighed, appraising him blankly once more. Ho Cong was not a good-looking man, but he was at least average in the category.
He was not smart either and came from humble origins, but with that kind of background, he was still not satisfied and even had the audacity to be picky after marrying me.
Having got out of the car, he affably pulled the door and invited me in. I stopped him hurriedly from leaning over and fastening my seat belt and off-handedly said, "Go away."
He slumped back in the driver's seat in defeat. He looked at me compassionately, showing that he was not in any rush to start the car, "Zhi, why are you doing this to yourself! You’ve been provided with good living conditions so that you can be well prepared for the baby, but here you are hanging out with Sang Qi! Do you know who he is? He’s a playboy!"
Judging from his tone, I noticed that Ho Cong seemed to dislike Sang Qi. I scoffed, if he detested him that much, then he should not have sent me to him.
"Don't you want me to give birth to this baby? It's good for the baby if I get on well with its father." I stared, blankly observing him.
His expression fell and formed into an unreadable one.
It was the most direct emotion I had seen from him so far, so I highly doubted that he was faking it.
"What are you talking about?"
I did not want to play dumb with him. In addition, I was moody because I have not had any dinner yet and was suffering from hypoglycemia and an injury. I cave in to the pressure and was unable to keep my calm, and so I begun shouting hysterically at him, "I’m asking you! Is Sang Qi the father?!"
Ho Cong's eyes seemed to pop out at my declaration, "What did you say? How come Sang Qi is the father?"
To my dismay, I did not bring the cufflink with me so I could not show it to him.
However, judging by his bewildered response, I suddenly felt like it was not sufficient evidence to prove that Sang Qi was the father.
I paused, receding into silence.
On the other hand, Ho Cong was excited upon the revelation, "Oh, I see. No wonder why you had to approach Sang Qi. You thought he was your baby's father!"
Leaning dejectedly on the back of my chair, I closed my eyes tiredly as my strength gradually pulled away from my body.
I was too lazy to ask him again for clarification, but upon seeing Ho Cong’s face, the answer that would surely come out from his mouth would affirm that my previous assumptions were negative.
I remained still in my lax position for a while before I opened my eyes and asked, "Why don’t you drive now?"
He started the engine at my rhetorical question and started babbling, “Zhi, you've been stubborn for half your life. Please listen to me this time. I know it was my fault, but I didn’t have a choice.” A tense quiet fell over the both of us as I waited for him to proceed, “We're all ordinary people. Think about it carefully, who do you think made you stand out? If I didn't do that, we would be suffering by now due to our financial issues. I assure you that we won’t be mistreated once you have the baby. I can pretend that nothing ever happened, and I promise I’ll love you as much as I used to."
Sincerity dripped like honey from his voice, his desperation to mend things between us leading him to instinctively reach over to hold my hand.
I shook off his hand in a flash, feeling sick as soon as he touched me.
It was easier for him to pretend nothing had happened. After all, he was not the victim bearing all the drawbacks.
Of course, he could pretend that the dilemma had never existed once I had given birth, but what about me? I would be carrying a child in my womb for nine months; it was a part of me, so how could I achieve turning a blind eye to it?
His temper had not flared, nor did I incite his annoyance to rile up in him when I pushed him away abruptly. He had a good reign over his feelings, and had never been angry at me.
The tolerance he showed made me think that he was being mild,
but the sinking feeling in my chest knew that what I was seeing now was his practiced behavior, and not his heart.
I never did have a glimpse at his true core in all the time we had spent together, and it was sad to say that it had stayed unchanged until this moment.
Still, whatever it was, all I knew was that he was a coward.
Someone had taken a fancy at his wife, and he was timid and greedy enough for money to send his wife to that person's bed.
It was not consensual; I was not a mere product to be sold off at any time he liked. He did not own me, so how could he have the right do this to me?
Furthermore, he did not even have the courage to clear up my name in front of his mother.
Disappointment was a feeling that could no longer encapsulate the gravity of what I felt for his outrageous actions, so I chose to end it all.
"Stop!" I demanded coldly and then unfastened my seat belt.
"We haven’t gotten there yet," Nervousness was apparent in the way he examined me when he saw me open the door. He pulled up at the roadside immediately and said, "What are you doing?"
"I don't want you to send me there. From now on, I don't want to see you again. You’re making me so sick." I got out and slammed the door shut behind me.
I staggered but stubbornly held my ground as I trudged in high heels.
Ho Cong drove up, rolling down his window and turned to me worriedly, "Zhi, you said you’re sick, is it because you are pregnant?"
I stopped, furiously gazing back at him and yelled, "Get away!"
There were many villains in the world. Some were pure wicked, while some bad guys still had their boundaries.
Ho Cong was not any of them because he was not evil, but plain despicable.
He makes me sick.
I ignored his calls until he eventually gave up and went on his own way. It took me a while to get back to the villa, my painful feet aching with blisters formed from the excruciating journey I had to trek after deserting Ho Cong’s vehicle.
The first thing I did once I have arrived was to order Jin to get some hot water so I could soak my feet.
I did not often wear high heels, but I had been subjected to an agonizing torture by walking for so long today in them.
After that, the second thing I had to do was to eat.
Jin and Ms. Cai helped me carry the bucket to the dining room, so I could happily soak my feet to relieve it of its suffering while feasting on my dinner.
Additionally, eating while using my phone helped me forget my worries for a while.
I had a big piece of stewed pork in my mouth in which I swallowed after forgetting to chew it. I almost choked at the food when I stumbled upon some shocking news as I scrolled on my cell.
The video of Yao Keyi and me made the news; our same attire and supposed jealously over Sang Qi making the headlines.
Having worked as a journalist for three years, I had never been faced with popularity, but just as I lost my job on the field and started working as Sang Qi’s secretary on the first day, my name had somehow made its way all over the internet.
I went through netizens’ comments and found that they treated me with great malevolence and continuously cursed me to hell.
I snorted at the ridiculousness; did I eat their rice or wear their clothes? Was it their business if I really fought for a man?
My heartless self permitted me to not lose my huge appetite, and thus, I had finished all the dishes on the table with ease despite the terrible press circulating around me.
After the hearty meal and a shower, I lay on the sofa and watched TV.
Jin sat next to me to cut the fruits as a dessert for me. The large white plate was covered with colorful delicacies, and soon, she had started feeding me obediently with a fork.
I took my time to enjoy the leisure.
I knew in my heart that I had everything that I had ever hoped for at present; not because I was a VIP, but because I had not lost my value yet.
After that was used up, I would certainly be thrown away, so I should enjoy it well while the offer still stood.
"I want to eat durian," I said to Jin.
"We don’t have one at home now but I'll buy it tomorrow,"
"Okay," I was quite satisfied with my situation where I could get whatever I wanted.
However, I did not intend to continue on with this good life.
On the way back, I had decided on one, crucial thing.
I was going to have an abortion.
Whoever that father was, I would not let him succeed.
He was fantasizing if he wanted me to give birth for him as he wished.
I would rather die than be a breeding machine.
My only problem was that I had no money.
I asked Jin, "Does Mr. Dong leave some pocket money for me?"
Jin and Ms. Cai speechlessly exchanged looks then shook their heads, "Mr. Dong only gives us money to buy food every day, so there’s usually nothing left.”
They were so stingy. I might as well be treated like a pet canary.