Chapter 31 Drunk In Love [Titania]

• I want revenge. I want closure. I know he's somewhere in the world, preying on other girls who have lost their voices, just like me. Who have lost the will to trust the ones around them and speak up. I want to erase those black days. To erase the painful memories. To make everything go back to how it once was. How perfectly happy Uncle Patrick and I were.
• Tears stream down my cheeks but I wipe them off hastily, clenching my fists by my side. No, I won't cry. I'll be strong. Hardening my face, I clean my eyes dry and take a deep breath, dressing up hastily. I move out, back into Kristoff's office, my vision blurry. Without thinking, I pick up the wine glass Kristoff left behind. There's still a little wine left, and the bottle on the table. I down the glass empty and pour myself another, and another and another until I can't feel my legs anymore and collapse on my back on the swivel chair meant for guests. I sit there calmly for a long time, my nerves weak, my gaze fixed on the picture on the wall opposite. At a point, I toss the glass aside and drink directly from the bottle.
• At last, I force myself to stand, carrying the glass and bottle with me to his desk. I don't know what I'm doing. And I don't care. I'm alone and I feel great about it, for the first time ever. I need to take advantage of this good feeling in my chest. I take big gulps, swinging my legs in the air, my eyes on the monitors. On the dancers. I can't stand them. I can't stand this place. I can't stand the memory of what I've shared with Kristoff today, and I want nothing more but to smash the bottle against the wall. Upturn every content in this grand office, until my rage is satisfied. Until I'm satisfied. But instead, I plop down lazily on his huge chair — the soft leather engulfing me, holding me like a baby, keeping me safe and sound.