Chapter 8

• They didn't say anything for a while; I guessed there was something else they could have said about her, but that part of the story was kept secret, too. "We found the third girl two years ago, when we were already detectives, done with drugs, living in a nice house like this. And everything was relatively good, but she couldn't handle the pressure from her family. Not everyone accepts this kind of relationship".
• We sat in silence for a while, watching the waves. How complicated things can be when something doesn't fit into someone else's morals. I'd heard of polyamorous relationships, but there was only one polyamorous girl in my circle. We weren't close, so I never took an interest in her personal life. All I learned was that everything is very individual, but polyamorous relationships are built on trust and complete honesty. At the time, I thought it was just empty words, that every relationship should be built on honesty, but now it seemed different.
• We were silent for another minute. Then, Owen got up from the sand, walked over to me, looked me straight in the eye, and asked:
• "Would you be in a relationship like this? Be honest".
• A yes or no answer isn't enough to express how I felt. The desire to try something new definitely leads to a ' yes ', but who wants to be judged by others? "No, of course not," the rational part of my alter ego keeps saying. And it's all mixed up in an overly complex tangle of emotions. Such an open and direct question pinned me down. "Complete honesty," the phrase popped into my head. "Honestly, it just doesn't seem right".
• Owen's lips touched mine, running his tongue over them, and I reached up to meet him, opening my mouth. The kiss was soft and gentle for a while, but I can't break it. Then he pulled away and asked, "Did you feel good just now? Be honest".
• I nodded slowly.
• "Now you were kissed by one man while you were in the arms of another," he kept his eyes on me. "We decide what is right for us. A polyamorous relationship isn't just about sex, it's about relationships, commitment and caring".
• These were hard words for me to say, but they needed to be said, "I'd like to try it".
• We spent the rest of the day in bed, we didn't get to wine or TV shows. But I learned a little more about their lives and their relationships. It took some digesting to realize that I had become a part of a polyamorous trio.
• The four days went by too fast, but at the same time, they flew by without a second thought. I didn't tell my friends how I spent the night, didn't share my concerns about the two men in my life. Normally, we discuss everything without judgment or shyness, but in a situation like this, you can't be completely sure of the reaction of the people close to you. I've decided that until I can say for sure what will happen next, I shouldn't worry my friends for nothing. It could be over before it even begins. The future is impossible to predict.
• I worked a full shift, came home late, rested, and started all over again in the morning. Cartin noticed that I was less talkative than before, but I chalked it up to fatigue. We agreed to relax, go shopping at the mall, and then to the club when Veronica, Katrine, and I had a weekend off. It was a rare occurrence lately.
• All these days I thought about Aaron, who had told me how he had realized his bisexuality as a young man. He liked men and women equally. But after a long relationship with a woman, he wanted to find a male partner. And vice versa. Then there was a fascination with rock music; he played guitar and sang in a band; there were drugs, alcohol, and lots of sex. It was during this period of his life that he met Owen. They met at a BDSM club where Aaron was performing, and Owen was a regular guest. At first, it was just friendship, shared interests. They rode bikes, hung out, and drank until the sun came up. They tossed and turned in bed with different women. One day, however, they became a couple. For Owen, it was his first relationship with a man. And I have no idea how Aaron seduced him, but it looks hot in my head.
• They dated for six months but quickly broke up. First, they realized that being a monogamous gay couple was not for them. They both needed more. The second reason was drugs. Owen was tired of vacations that lasted nights and days, of different relationships with strangers, of endless orgies. It wasn't the kind of relationship he wanted. And it could have ended there.
• They told their stories as we lay in bed, exhausted from the hot sex. We were closer than ever. Aaron rested his head on my stomach, his black hair tickling my skin, and I lay on Owen's shoulder, his fingertips tracing patterns on my chest. We breathed the same air and stared up at the endless white, gleaming ceiling, reflecting the glare of the sun sinking into the ocean.
• Aaron talked happily, even about drugs, without shame or embarrassment. On the contrary, he was very proud that he was clean now. Owen's voice, on the other hand, was more sad, especially when it came to the separation that had lasted about a year. Though they continued to cross paths in bars and clubs, with mutual acquaintances. One day, Aaron was having a drink with a friend at a tattoo parlor and Owen came in for a procedure and was finishing the letters on his shin. The finishing touches were still there.
• "I dedicated the tattoo to him," Owen laughed, ruffling Aaron's black hair, "If you add up all the letters, it says, 'Amor non est medicabilis herbis".
• "There is no cure for love," Aaron echoed.