Chapter 60

• Dear Sara,
• I'm sorry. I am so sorry.
• I'm writing this letter without any intention of hurting you, only to tell you about how I am feeling and what has happened. You are my oldest friend and have been with me for my whole life and I want to thank you for that. Thank you for being with me for so long, despite the way I was treating you. I know that I have fucked with you and your feelings and I know that I do not deserve you and that we do not belong together. So, with this is mind, I ask you - beg you- to please forgive me. I think we both know that we didn't belong together, that maybe we were only together because of how close we were growing up; that even though there wasn't that strong of feelings, we still drifted towards each other because we had to. I'm not saying that I don't love you, because I do. I do love you, I promise, but not in the way you wish I did. I love you like an old family friend, because that is what you are and I'm sorry it is nothing more than that. I know it sounds fucked up, but I want to be nothing but honest with you. I'm hoping one day that I would be able to tell her too, but for now I needto tell you, to justify everything that I have done to you, I suppose. I'm not so sure.