Chapter 1 Cutting Ties

• KYLO
• Pain, like a diamond, has many facets.
• As I recently found out, pain, like a diamond, can take different shapes and patterns, styles and quality...faces…
• Poorly cut diamonds have a dull sparkle; they don’t shine as brightly. The ache in my heart cut deep and no matter how hard I tried to suppress it, to hide it, its ugliness had broken through and reared its head. And there was no way of preventing it. I was cut open for anyone with eyes to see.
• How much more pain could they endure before they crumbled? I’d used all the reserves of my strength and perseverance and I had nothing left. I was done. Finished. Messed up.
• I’ve tried to be strong for my sister, but our mother’s health challenges have gotten the best and worst of me. I’ve tried and done everything to keep her alive, but even all my millions proved to be useless. No matter how much money I threw around, she was slowly slipping away. My money couldn’t save her. All the money in the world couldn’t save her.
• What was it all for if it couldn’t help me when I needed it the most?
• It was all just useless.
• Then there was Oaklynn…
• Oaklynn…Oaklynn…Oaklynn…
• Where do I even start with that whole mess? All I could say was, Thank you for breaking my heart, Oaklynn Turner. Thank you for showing me your true colors. Thank you for reminding me not to trust so easily again.
• Just when I thought my heart couldn’t hurt any more than it was, she did the impossible and inflicted unthinkable pain. She shattered it into a million pieces, and as if that wasn’t enough, she crushed it into powder.
• The one person that I gave my heart to, trusted her with it, and she dug a dagger into it.
• My friends were probably fed up with consoling me when I cried. I seemed to do that a lot lately. On most nights, I’d drive to Kyle’s, and park outside until he came out. He’d pull me out of the car and hug me while I bawled my eyes out. When I’d run out of tears, he’d open the car door, buckle me in, and wait until I drove off. Weird, but he knew what I appreciated, that he knew exactly what I needed without having to ask.
• I’d go to Jordan if I wanted to drown my sorrows. We’d stay up and drink or find a pub or something and drink all night. When I’d had enough, he’d tell his driver to take me home. He wasn’t very open with his feelings, but that didn’t make him a good friend. He was the best.
• Corbyn was the geek, and I’d go to him to forget for a while. We’d stay up and play computer games until my fingers were numb.
• In their own small ways, my friends were always there for me.
• That was the mistake I made. A gamble I took, and I wouldn’t repeat it.
• I wasn’t going to give her another chance to hurt me again.
• I was done with her lying.
• Oh, she’d tried to make amends. Tried to convince me that her little white lie didn’t mean anything. That the ring on her finger was just a stupid misunderstanding. That I was suddenly the only man that she loved and wanted to be with until Armageddon or whatever.
• I would have believed her.
• If only she hadn’t called me by that name in the heat of the moment. She called me by his name. The name of the man she truly loved. The only one who owned and would always have a claim to her heart. I may have fooled myself into thinking that she was over him, only because she did an excellent job of pretending that she was. Pretending I wasn’t her rebound and that she was just using me to get over him. Truth is, I never stood a chance.
• It was a lie. All of it.
• The kisses. The touches. The I love yous. The memories.
• Everything was just one big fat lie.
• Take now, for instance. She was sitting outside my bedroom door singing Moelogo and Jonas Blue’s We Could Go Back. Well, at least she was trying, too. The girl couldn’t sing to save her life.
• I’d told Zorii and Cash not to let her in, but they were her strongest advocates and always urged me to give her another chance.
• In answer to her song, I cued Mistakes with Paloma Faith on my iPod, turning the volume up so she would hear every word.
• I’d had enough.
• It was time to put an end to this once and for all.
• Catching her by surprise, I opened my door and she fell through, landing on her back. “Get up,” I said, holding out my hand for her.
• “I wasn’t expecting that,” she laughed, pushing her messy hair off her face as she stood. Seeing her again after so long weakened me. I had to get rid of her before I crumbled.
• “This needs to stop, Oaklynn.”
• “You wouldn’t talk to me. I didn’t know what else to do.”
• “That’s easy.” My face hardened, and I bit the inside of my cheek. “Stay away from me. Stop calling me. Stop blowing up my social media DMs. Stop stalking me, and please stop coming over here. Is that clear enough?”
• “Y-yes…” The dew of her tears clung to her long, thick lashes as she blinked rapidly. “I understand. You don’t want to see me anymore.”
• I marched to the door and held it open. “Finally, she gets it.”
• “Can you just-if you can just give me five minutes of your time?”
• “Why, so you can call me Tristan again?” Hearing her calling me that was the ultimate insult. She could have as well spat on me and rubbed it in my face.
• “Kylo, please…it was a mistake…I’m sorry…please?”
• “I need to focus on my mom. I don’t have time for this.”
• “Baby, please?”
• “Don’t,” I frowned and avoided her touch when I noticed that she was still wearing his ring, “Just leave and don’t come back.”
• “Got it.”
• And finally, I could take air into my lungs and let it out again. She was gone.
• But my heart felt anything but relief.
• If anything, it ached even more.