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Chapter 5

  • My heart began to race. I put a hand on my chest to calm myself. I decided to take a shower. After taking a quick shower I changed into my Casual Shirt and Trouser. I put a hand on my waist as I stared at my reflection in the mirror. But, I don't think it's a good idea. Its night and he's not even here. Well, I am nervous so, I am not complaining. I set my clothes in the wardrobe to pass the time. I walked around the room. Only Mother and Father had a master bedroom back at home. It has a master bed. The left corner has two sofas with a coffee table. It was really beautiful. There's a chandelier too. The dressing table was too big. The right corner has a really big vase. There's a portrait of him on the wall. I wish there would a portrait of us too there. In our home, Mother is the 'Ma'am', here I am. I felt kinda proud. Since he has no intentions of coming I decided to sleep.
  • I woke up due to thirst. I saw an empty jug of water. Great. I sighed and looked at the time 2am. I looked on the other side but, Desmond was nowhere to be found. Since my throat is begging for some water I decided to get some. Finding kitchen at this time of the hour is a distant matter, making up my mind to get up comes first. I sighed as I got out of bed and went to find the kitchen.
  • I was walking in the empty halls. That sorta scared me. I was walking when I saw a light. I walked towards the light. I got closer and pushed the door opened. I saw Desmond in a complete mess. His bow was missing. Few buttons of his shirt are opened; showing his toned chest. His coat was thrown on the ground. His sleeves are rolled upward. His perfectly combed hairs are messy. He was panting. There is an empty whiskey bottle on the table. Is he drunk? I picked the coat and said in a soft tone,
  • "Desmond, Are you alright?"
  • He looked at me. He looked drunk.
  • "Alright?"He asked. He stood up and walked toward me. My heart began to beat fast as he walked closer. His hands are in the pocket of his pants. He leans in, His breath reeks of Alcohol. He's drunk.
  • "Alright?"He repeated himself. His voice sounds exasperated. I gulped in fear. When I was about to take a step back I was pinned harshly to the wall. I squeaked in pain. He glared at me as he leans in and said in a deep voice,
  • "I am not alright. I have warned you but, you didn't listen. From now on, whatever happened to you; don't blame me for it.
  • I don't even love you. Don't expect any kind of love from me. To me, you are a contempt. You are worthless to me. The only thing you can do for me is to satisfy my lust. Apart from that, you are a Disdain.
  • Now, GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!"
  • I gasped with extreme fear and pushed him away and ran away to the room. I sat in a corner and cried to myself in fright but not in heartbreak because he already warned me about it. That's my future, the life I granted to myself because of my goddamn illusions, the misery I bestowed upon myself. I hate myself for being so painfully optimistic. That's what I am to him; A disdain.
  • I woke up and found myself in the same corner I cried. I didn't even expect to magically wake up on bed as well. I stood up and sniffed. Why do I agree for this? What happened to me? I am such a desperate woman, dying for someone to love her or ignite the sparks of love. 
  • I wish that he'll love me one day. Okay, Not now. But, One day.
  • I freshen myself and looked at my reflection. Apart from my puffy red eyes, everything is alright. I have decided to wear a knee-length blue dress. As I was getting ready, the door knocked,
  • "Who is it?" I asked.
  • "Ma'am, It's Savannah. Sir is waiting for you in the dining hall." My heart stopped. I don't have enough courage to face him. He is waiting for me doesn't matter. My heart still aches because of last night's event.
  • I sighed. It's my first day, I should go. After protesting my heart, I went to the dining hall.
  • I saw him sitting in the head of the house chair. His messy form has transformed into his usual Dominating form. Meaning he came to the room last night. Okay, calm down. I looked at him, His elbows are resting on the table while his hands are joined together. He looked so serious. I inhaled and walked towards him,
  • "Good Morning!" I smiled at him. He looked at me with such seriousness but my smile didn't fade away.
  • "What happened to your eyes?" He asked referring to my red and puffy eyes.
  • "Oh..That's Nothing, the result of my own action... Of marrying you." I said still smiling.
  • He put his hands down as the breakfast was served. We began to eat in silence. I opened my mouth to say something but, he spoke first,
  • "I clearly remembered what happened last night." I choked on my food a little when he said that. I looked at him with wide eyes as he continued,
  • "Don't give fake consolation to yourself. Everything I said is true. You shouldn't have married me. You're gonna regret your decision" I looked at him in disbelief.
  • "How can you say such heartbreaking things?" I said in a broken voice. Why this is happening to me?
  • "Because they are true. Don't expect any kind of love and affection from me." I looked down and bit my cheeks to not to cry. How can he, be that cold? "Why are you doing this? Do you feel good by giving me tears?" I asked. 
  • "I have to. You and I cannot be together."