Chapter 6

• "Your father is sick, Zio." The soft notification made Ignazio's heart throb painfully. It was a voice recording of his cousin, Geremia, saved in the voice recorder on his cellphone.
• "Some time ago, he was treated for a heart attack. Excessive stress was the cause." His cousin continued again.
• Geremia knows better about Ignazio's father's condition because, for one thing, the man lives in the same town as Ignazio's family. And secondly, Geremia is a heart specialist. So he knows the ins and outs and effects of his father's condition.
• "Uncle is trying to be strong. But no matter how strong he is, too many thoughts are not something he can easily bear, Zio.
• "Go home. Apart from Uncle's sake, do it for your younger siblings and..." Geremia's words didn't continue because Ignazio had already turned off the recording.
• Ignazio sat in his portable chair. Raise his head and look at the starry sky in the dark of night.
• Five years.
• He has been running from real life for five years. He was trying to escape the hustle and bustle of the world, trying to avoid family and trying to get rid of the feeling of love and loss that was festering in his chest.
• Satisfied?
• Ignazio didn't feel any satisfaction at all.
• The feeling of loss does not disappear. But it's getting worse.
• Plus, he felt isolated and very lonely.
• He wanted to go back, but he realized that he had chosen to run first.
• Not just once, but many times, even hundreds of times, his family contacted him and asked Ignazio to return. They keep saying they will give Ignazio time, but they hope Ignazio will still come back. Meanwhile, Ignazio himself? He is still adamant about his choice to leave.
• Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. And now months have turned into years.
• Ignazio felt worse and worse.
• He thought that traveling would make him feel comfortable. But apart from being a jungle child, he never had that comfort.
• Nightmares still come almost every night.
• His mother's sad face when he chose to leave her was always in his mind. Gretta was thin with a pale face, who gave up and left him as well as the tiny, red-cheeked baby wrapped in a pink blanket that he had only seen once since her birth.
• Her mother, siblings, and family diligently sent Ignazio updates on their daughter. But before he even opened the photos, before he downloaded the videos, he had already deleted them and removed them from the gallery as if they weren't important to him.
• Ignazio didn't know how he felt. He didn't know what to categorize his emotions into.
• Angry? He wasn't angry, not at all.
• Hate? He didn't feel that either. There was no hatred in his heart for anyone at the moment.
• Disappointed? Yes, he was disappointed. But as time went by, he was able to accept the fact that his and Gretta's soul mate ended there.
• So what does he feel now?
• Afraid?
• Yes, Ignazio is afraid. Even though he knows his family will welcome him back if he comes home, he still worries that things will never be the same again.
• He was afraid of the distance he had caused. And he was worried, facing the fact that over the past five years, he had hurt not only himself but also his mother, father, younger siblings and maybe the little girl.
• A tear fell in the corner of Ignazio's eye. He closed his eyes. Cry silently. He apologized, who he didn't know who he should address first.
• "Come back..." The whisper made his eyes open instantly.
• Ignazio knew it was just his hallucination. The remaining image he had of Gretta was still stored in his head. Ignazio lowered his head. His hands rubbed his face roughly. And immediately, he got up from his seat. He packed everything and drove the car from the mountain foot area onto the main road.
• A weeks later
• The announcement that the plane was about to land made everyone fasten their seat belts. Ignazio looked out the window where he was sitting. Manhattan's sky was bright, but his heart wasn't as bright.
• 'What will I do now?' Ignazio asked himself. 'Where should I go?'
• Ignazio did not tell anyone the news of his return. Not to his mother, who still sent him voice mail an hour before he boarded the plane. Not even Geremia, who still diligently gave him information about his father.
• Ignazio grabbed his carrier and stepped off the plane, which had landed perfectly. It only carries a little. Only the clothes he is currently wearing and some crucial documents that Ignazio always needs. Ignazio keeps the rest of the things he needs at his residence in Italy, and he may ask someone to send them when he knows where he will live.
• Ignazio walked towards the taxi parked outside the airport. Enter and immediately see the driver's polite greeting. He smiled when the driver asked him in broken Italian.
• In the past, things like this were always the butt of jokes between him and Geremia.
• Of course, with their stature and faces with foreign contours, considering that they had Italian blood in their bodies, everyone always suspected that he and Geremia were visitors who were not fluent in English. Even though the fact is...
• Ignazio stated his residence address in fluent English, and the taxi driver was surprised to hear that. However, without saying much, the man drove his car and took Ignazio to his residence.
• Ignazio did not mention his parents' residence address. He also did not mention the house address he and the late Gretta lived in before his wife died. Ignazio mentioned the address of the apartment he used to live in before he decided to end his bachelor life.