Chapter 39

• ELOISE
• It was like breathing. Running. I knew it like the back of my hand. I did it whenever circumstances proved to be too much to handle. I was doing it now. The only difference this time around was it wasn't working at all. I could still feel the hot tears burning my eyes, but I couldn't stop running. My chest hurt. Breathing hurt. It didn't even register to me that I was crying in a run until I tripped over something hard and unyielding in my path. A rock probably.
• As soon as I hit the ground, I rolled over onto my front. The impact jarred the air from my lungs and I curled into myself, clutching my side with one hand while trying to get my breath back with the other. I registered that I was outside of the Aster pack hall. The soft glow of the moon blanketing me and the shrubs were easy giveaways. I remained there wondering why I was doing this to myself especially since I had told myself that I wanted to be free. It wasn't hate I had for Matthan. Dream or not, I had forgiven him. It was not the kiss either. I couldn't exactly say I hated it when I had enjoyed it. Then it clicked for me. It was the fact that I had enjoyed it instead of pushing him away. Yet, I couldn't place my finger as to why enjoying something that came so naturally felt so wrong.