Chapter 43

• Night sleeping alone I could get immediate orgasm that too repeatedly, just by fantasizing about Praveen. How it would feel he hugs me tightly, if we kiss with open mouth and tongue, how big his weapon may be, will I be able to take him inside me, will it hurt, can I enjoy etc., I fell asleep with such fantasy.
• Next two days I spent all alone just watching TV, eating, and masturbating on bed. Gradually I was getting fed up. I started thinking of how mom was enjoying her life even now with not one but two or three partners. Is it wrong? Slowly I started to believe that if not right it is also not completely wrong if I get a good bad partner to do justice to my sexual needs. This thought started to sink in me and I made up my mind to find a suitable partner, it him a gigolo. Suddenly I thought of Praveen! Yes, why not ? He was staying alone for next several months at least and I am also alone. After long thinking I decided to go ahead. Seduce Praveen first and see his reaction. Just then I saw a message and coincidentally it was from Praveen. Wah! He had sent a Hi, that is all. I replied back and then he asked what I was doing. We chatted general issues, about health of Sujatha.
• That was Friday and incidentally it was 14h of February, the Valentine day. He sent a message again with a big Hi with a kiss and rose emoji wishing Valentine day. I reciprocated his wishes. I was thinking about What was happening to me? Has god heard me? Mustering courage I replied with a related GIF image. He liked it and asked me if I was free that evening for dinner. My heart started pounding. I was alone and felt why not go out and spend time entertaining myself. I agreed to go out for dinner. Praveen told that evening by seven he will pick me up from my house.