Chapter 6 Cowards Way Out

• Silas’s P.O.V
• I came back to consciousness after some time, a few minutes, by my estimation. I was not the type to panic upon disorientation, so after blinking myself fully awake, I was already in the right enough state of mind to know what to do.
• First, I took stock of my surroundings. It was dark, with only the light of the moon and stars to illuminate my surroundings, so I had to squint in order for me to see. The fall must have affected my vision; otherwise everything around me would’ve been crystal clear by now. I was in a forest, and it was eerily silent except for the subtle sound of running water. From this, I could gather that I was sitting next to a stream. I could not sense anyone nearby, not other wolves or other woodland creatures. So, I concluded, for now I was somewhat safe.
• Next, I took a look at myself. My arms and face were covered in cuts and bruises. And I was stained with blood that was both mine and Lily's.
• Lily. Oh, how the world would mourn her loss. It's times like this where I feel like I'm better off being wolf than human. The wolf was the feral part of me, the animal surviving on instinct and not bound by human emotions like loss and guilt and pity that only lead to irrational decisions.
• I recalled the entire evening like it had happened only a second ago. Not only had I been the one to find Lily’s body, I had been the one to take out the dagger from her abdomen and as fate would have it, that had been the exact moment that my half-brother had walked in on me, along with his friends and the whole situation had gotten so out of hand that I couldn’t even find time to explain myself.
• So I had done the worst think I could possibly think of. I had taken the coward’s way out. I had ran, making the matter even worse and confirming the suspicion in everyone’s hearts…that I was the one who did it. That I was the one who killed Lily.
• “Get him!” I could vividly remember my brother’s angry shout as I placed Lily’s body back on the floor as gently as I could and clutched the dagger in my hands tightly before rushing out to the living room windows and jumping out of it, breaking through the glass in the process.
• The shards didn’t hurt me as much as the pain of losing the woman I had once love…as much as losing the trust of the man I considered my older brother. The tiny cuts from the broken glass on my face, on my skin, would heal quickly…but how do I heal the wounds on my heart?
• But I didn’t have time to think anymore, because as I ran away from the house that belonged to my brother and his mate…I heard warning howls go up into the night sky, a sign that told the pack that an enemy had been detected. And the shock of the situation nearly made me stumble upon my legs.
• Me.
• Those howls…those warning howls that told the pack of the enemy…were for me.
• My very own pack had just then declared me, their Alpha, to be their enemy, and turned me into a rogue.
• In my mind, I felt the bond snap the very next instant; the bond that connected me to my packmates. And the pain of that loss made me crumble to my knees with my head held in my hands. My wolf howled inside my head in unimaginable pain and loss and I felt my vision go blurry with unshed tears.
• “Traitor!”
• But I didn’t have time to think about how the pack had abandoned me when I needed them the most, because my packmates angry voices sounded from not too far away.
• Getting back up onto my legs was the hardest I had done in my life. My legs trembled, threatening to give away from under me, but I held onto my strength and my sanity and I ran once again. I needed to get out of here and I needed to get out of here alive. I clutched the dagger in my hand even tighter. I didn’t know why I had brought this dagger here with me, but all I knew was that this was all I had as evidence and this was the murder weapon. If there was anything I could use to find out who killed Lily, it will be this dagger itself.
• And so I ran, escaping from all the patrol guards that stood in my way, trying to capture me alive. And soon enough, I found myself standing in front of a cliff, with several wolves behind me. I knew if I got caught, there would be no way of explaining anything. And once I had chosen to run, I had already made myself the killer, so what was the point of surrendering now?
• So I had done what I could think of. I had bit down on the dagger, holding it firmly between my clenched teeth and then I had jumped off the cliff, transforming into my wolf form mid-air, in the hopes that my fur would absorb some of the hit as I went down. My clothes had ripped away from my body and that was how I had woken up, bruised and bloody, at the end of the cliff.
• Now, I searched for the dagger that I had taken with me, the one clue that I had left of Lily’s murdered. It wasn’t lying far from me and there was still blood all over the blade, on the hilt. I found some dried leaves from the ground and wrapped the dagger as tightly as I could with the leaves before hiding it behind a set of rocks that lined the river’s edge.
• I had to make sure that I remembered this spot from now on, because once I was safe, I would have to return here once again and find it. I would need it tested in a lab for DNA traces. But of that, I would have to think about later on. Right now, the only thing on my mind was survival, which the wolf was an expert at. So without thinking, I turned back into my wolf form once again, waiting only a few seconds for the pain and pleasure of the transformation as my bones and muscles shifted places.
• In my wolf form, my cuts stained my fur, and I looked a lot like a beat up dog rather than a strong Alpha. So long gone was my power, and with it, my pack and family. To think that I was once at the top of the food chain, the apex predator of the pyramid, and now I was reduced to nothing but an exile.
• I dove into the stream with the intent to wash off the blood and grime from my beaten up body. I made sure that I was as relatively clean as I could get in order to avoid any infections and the like. Once I was satisfied, I upped my senses again to ensure that there truly was nobody and nothing around me, before getting out of the water and drying my fur out by shaking my body. The water would mask my scent from afar, so there was anyone still searching this area, they would not be able to smell me coming.
• Now came the hard part. Finding a hiding spot. A place where I could stay until the air was clear and the rumors had died down and I was no longer being hunted down like a rabid dog…only then I could come out of hiding and find out what really happened to Lily.