Chapter 4

• Luana Davis
• (Weeks before)
• I just graduated and got a job at an office of a subcontracted company for the municipality, and my position is quite easygoing. I just need to focus and do everything correctly, and at the end of the month, everything will be fine!
• I arrived at work today, and from afar, as soon as I crossed the hallway, I could see the size of the stack of documents for evaluation that I need to analyze and seize. I already know that I won't be able to see anything from that desk today. I need to speed up, otherwise, it will increase a lot tomorrow!
• "Luana, you're late! Next time, I'll deduct it from your salary!" my boss said as he passed by me. I took a deep breath. I always end up staying after hours...
• "But it was only five minutes!" I complained.
• "Five minutes every day, if we count..." he replied.
• Sometimes, I pretend not to hear these annoyances because I need to keep my job. I have several bills to pay because my boyfriend, Hélio, is a hurricane when it comes to exceeding the limits of my credit cards, all in the name of those damn miles he talks about...
• Apart from my annoying boss, it seems like nobody sees me here. They must be too busy, that's the only explanation. I only receive orders from everyone and spend the whole day solving my own work and other people's messes, but I'm used to it.
• "Luana, the materials for the office expansion haven't arrived. Call them and find out what happened!" Emma, who works a few desks away from mine, said.
• "But wasn't that your responsibility?" I asked.
• "Now I need you to handle it. I can't stop my work for this!" Emma replied, and I decided to help.
• I adjusted my glasses, which were starting to become loose, and went back to work until my landline phone rang.
• On the line...
• "Office two, Luana speaking, who's calling?" I answered.
• "Luana, I'm transferring the reception extension to you. I need to go to the bathroom, and I'll take a little while!" said the receptionist, and I couldn't do anything about it.
• "Okay! You can transfer it..."
• "Great!" she replied.
• Call ended...
• The phone barely touched the receiver, and it started ringing again...
• "Lins Office, reception, good morning!" I answered.
• "I would like to speak with someone from the administrative department. Can you transfer me?" a woman asked.
• "Just a minute, I'll transfer you!"
• And so, more than an hour passed, and I could hardly work. That phone wouldn't stop ringing, and things are always like this here. Many times, I end up working late.
• Just another day as usual, and everyone here suddenly decided that they want me to fetch coffee for them and print files. It would be much easier if each person went to their own desk and printed their own files, but unfortunately, this is one of the first tasks that always falls on me.
• So as soon as the receptionist arrived, there were several requests that had accumulated, and I left like crazy printing everything that was requested that was written down in my agenda, and I was already sweating when I ran to the café to get some of what they asked me for, too.
• I met a colleague there, who was more discouraged than me... "how could this be possible?" I thought.
• "What's wrong, Sérgio? Why are you so down?" I asked, while grabbing four of the coffees they asked me for.
• "My mother is very sick, she doesn't eat properly, and started coughing up blood, and no one knows what she has, I'm always spending more, and nothing is discovered, I don't know what else to do, Luana!" he said, with his head down, and I felt very sad for him, it seems like he really loves his mother...
• "Oh... is there anything that can be done?" I asked...
• "I need money for tomorrow's exams and I don't have it! Do you happen to have a little to lend me? I still need two hundred dollars..." he asked, looking at me sadly, and I would never refuse!
• "Of course, Sérgio! Health comes first! I'll get it from my purse, and you take care of your mom, I want her to get better soon!" I said, and I took the coffees, and he followed me, then I took the money from my purse and handed it to him.
• "Thank you, Luana!" he said, and then he left...
• This was another bill that I should have paid, but I'll figure it out! The important thing is to help his mother.
• My phone rang, and I smiled a little at my day, seeing the picture of my dear Hélio calling me, I can't believe he agreed to continue dating, but I had to promise some things so as not to ruin our relationship even more.
• Phone call on...
• "Hi handsome! It's great to talk to you!" I said when I answered.
• "Hi Luana! What time are you leaving today?" he asked.
• "I'll be a little late, but not too much! Nothing exaggerated! Will you wait for me at home?" I asked, excited, I miss him!
• "I have to go to my brother's to sort out some money issues, so I'll leave it for tomorrow then!" he said, leaving me worried.
• "Ohhh! Are you sure? We could watch a movie at home!" I commented.
• "Oh, no! I don't like watching movies outside the cinema, we'll go another day, I'll get some money there, and then we'll go!" he said.
• "Okay, then! Soon I'll be able to buy the tickets for the cruise I promised, and then it will be really fun!" I said, excited.
• "I see... I'm going to hang up now! Bye!"
• "Bye! Kiss..."
• Phone call off...
• Sometimes I worry a lot about losing Hélio, I need to find a way to get that money... I feel like he's the only one I have for me, since my mother never wanted me to be born. She tried in every way to have an abortion to kill me, she already had two daughters and under no circumstances wanted to have another baby.
• Luckily, she couldn't perform the abortion, until today we don't know if it was a medical mistake or something happened, or maybe it was my father who asked for it, since he did care a lot about me, but the procedure went wrong and I was born.
• It seems like I was meant to be born... not everything that people plan actually happens, and even though my mother didn't want me, here I am today. I can't say that my childhood was completely bad because my father always supported me and often prevented my mother or my sisters from mistreating me.
• It was clear how she only cared about the other two and left me aside! I always begged for a little bit of attention like any other child would, and my father always encouraged me by telling me that I was a princess. He often compared me to Cinderella, saying that he truly believed that one day I would find my prince charming and be very happy in my castle. His words gave me life and made me want to survive each day. They also made me stronger and taught me a lot about life.
• The problem is that in my life, things never happen as they should. I believe that luck hasn't knocked on my door yet, and I lost my father at a very young age. When I was only thirteen, he had a sudden illness and passed away without any explanations, without me even understanding what had happened. I had to understand that from then on, I would be alone and would have to fight for everything in my life, solve my problems and frustrations, and become strong enough to protect myself from the wounds that people tried to inflict on me...
• After he passed away, things got worse, and my sisters started taking advantage of me even more. They knew that my mother would always support them, and I, as always, was the ugly duckling of the family. With my black-framed glasses and dark lenses, I was considered the blind one, the clumsy, skinny, short one with hair always covering my face, and I had to do all the house chores day after day... I never understood why...
• That's why when it comes to Hélio, I get terrified just thinking about my life without him. I truly hope that we can overcome this and everything will be fine like it was in the beginning. I know that he likes me and wants the best for me, so that's why I work so hard to have a good life with him. Today, I'm going after that loan shark to get the money I need for that cruise. I will regain my relationship, which is now my priority.
• Since Hélio wouldn't come to my house today, I left the office and went straight to the loan shark that I was told would lend me the money.
• The place was very strange, and there were some very shady-looking men there, but they said they would lend me the money, and that was good enough for me.
• So as soon as I got it, I left and went directly to take care of the travel arrangements. This trip cost me many months of work and still needed to be paid for, but I would deal with that later. Right now, all I care about is our reconnection on this cruise, and finally giving him what he has always asked for... my virginity!