Chapter 1 Blue Eyes

• "I want this, Mommy!"
• Jillian turned to see her son clutching a chocolate bar, its wrapper featuring his favorite cartoon character.
• They were at the grocery store and had just passed by the sweets aisle when he stopped without her noticing.
• "Mommy, can you buy this for me, please?" he pleaded, lips pouted and big eyes wide like a puppy’s—his signature move at just four years old.
• “Shawn…” Jillian knelt down so she was eye level with her son.
• Smart parenting, she recalled, advised that looking a child in the eyes while speaking makes them feel heard and important.
• “What did Mommy tell you about eating too much chocolate?” she asked gently.
• “Not good,” he mumbled, his little shoulders slumping in defeat.
• “Then please put it back. You haven’t even finished the last one I bought for you, right?”
• “Okay, Mommy…” he whispered sadly before walking back and returning the chocolate bar to the shelf.
• Jillian wasn’t stingy with her son. She was simply careful. She once read an article warning that even young children could develop diabetes. And there was no way she would allow anything to harm her only child.
• She always made sure to explain things to Shawn. By God’s grace, he wasn’t the kind of child to throw tantrums when told no. He’d listen and obey without protest.
• Shawn was her entire world. Her only family. She’d do anything to protect him.
• “Done, Mommy!” Shawn returned to her side.
• She held his tiny hand in hers while pushing the shopping cart with the other. She wanted to place him in the cart so she could keep a closer eye on him, but Shawn refused—he insisted he was a big boy now.
• “You’re already sleepy, Mommy will carry you,” she said, stopping when she noticed him yawning. She was about to pick him up.
• “No! If Shawn sleeps, who will protect Mommy?” he said firmly, taking a step back.
• “You got it wrong, baby,” she said with a smile. “It’s Mommy’s job to take care of Shawn. Come, let me carry you so you can rest.”
• “No! Shawn will take care of Mommy,” he insisted with conviction. “I’m not going to sleep—I’m your bodyguard!”
• Jillian was touched. At such a young age, her son was already trying to protect her.
• “Okay, but stay close to Mommy, alright?” she said, ruffling his hair.
• Then she paused, staring at Shawn’s face.
• How long had it been? Five years?
• Time had flown so fast. Yet looking into those blue eyes—so much like someone she used to know—it felt like just yesterday.
• She smiled at her son and stood up.
• ‘How is he now?’ she wondered. ‘Does he still remember me? Has he forgiven me for the lies I told back then?’
• Jillian stood on tiptoe to reach the box of milk on the top shelf. She managed to get it, but sighed at her own lack of height.
• She hoped Shawn didn’t inherit that from her.
• She placed the milk in the cart—then realized, with a jolt, that Shawn was no longer beside her.
• “Shawn?” Her heart instantly pounded in her chest. She let go of the cart and looked around frantically. “Shawn!”
• Half-walking, half-running, she searched every aisle of the supermarket. Where could he be?!
• “Shawn?” Tears began to stream down her face, uncaring if people stared.
• She was certain she hadn’t taken her eyes off him for long. She had only grabbed the milk—
• “Ma’am,” a staff member approached her. “Is there a problem?”
• Crying now, Jillian gripped the woman's arms in panic. “My son! I can’t find my son! Did you see him? He’s wearing a red shirt and black shorts. He’s about this tall,” her voice trembled along with her hands.
• “Please help me! My son is missing!” she cried, shaking the woman before letting go and running off again, shouting Shawn’s name through the aisles.
• Shawn is only four. How could he have wandered off so quickly? What if someone took him?
• That terrifying thought doubled her panic. She felt like she was losing her mind. Was she a careless mother?
• Even as store staff tried to calm her down, she kept searching. She was causing a scene—but who could blame a mother searching for her lost child?
• “Ma’am,” another employee called out. “There’s a child crying in the meat section. He might be your son.”
• She quickly composed herself and followed. How did Shawn end up there? The meat section was on the opposite end of the large supermarket.
• “There, ma’am. Our supervisor is trying to calm him down.”
• Jillian’s heart leapt with relief when she saw her son crying in front of a man seated beside him. The man’s back was turned to her, but he was clearly talking to Shawn. A few more staff members were assisting them.
• She barely noticed the man—her focus was solely on her crying son. Her heart ached with guilt. What kind of mother was she to let this happen?
• “Shawn!” she called out.
• His head snapped up at the sound of her voice, and in a heartbeat, he ran into her open arms.
• “Mommy!” The joy and relief in his voice nearly broke her. “I’m sorry, Mommy! Did Shawn make you worry? Did Shawn make you cry?”
• He pulled back slightly and used his tiny hands to wipe away her tears.
• “It’s okay, baby. Mommy just got scared. I thought I lost you forever. Where did you go, huh?” she asked, still shaking from the fear, though tears no longer fell.
• “I saw someone with a balloon, Mommy… I followed them. I’m sorry.” He looked down. “But a good mister helped me. He told someone to find you.”
• Only then did Jillian remember the man who had been with Shawn.
• “I—Thank you so much, Mister—” Her words faltered the moment her eyes met his.
• Those eyes… those deep blue eyes that once looked at her with so much hatred.
• “So, you're alive, huh?” His voice was calm, but heavy with layered emotions Jillian couldn’t name.
• Only one thought raced through her mind: He wasn’t supposed to see them.
• “S-Sake…” she breathed, barely above a whisper, as she looked up at the man who once held her world in his hands.
• She swallowed hard as tears welled in her eyes once again. Memories came rushing back like an unrelenting tide.
• “It’s been a long time, Jillian…”
• He spoke her real name.
• Not Julia. But Jillian.
• Her chest tightened.
• And just like that, the walls she built around her heart began to crumble.