Chapter 4

• I woke up earlier than Toma so we could go to school separately, which must have disappointed him because he was used to our daily routine of heading to school together. He was probably missing our usual companionship today.
• I hoped he was doing fine on his own.
• "…Hmm, something's different," my seatmate, Xia, remarked as I took my place beside her.
• "There's nothing out of the ordinary," I replied, dismissing her observation.
• "No, really. There's definitely something different about you today." She glanced towards the entrance, where Toma had just walked in, alone.
• Our eyes met briefly. He gave me a faint smile and proceeded to his seat without any apparent concern. Xia then realized what had caught her attention.
• "That's it! You didn't come to school with your boyfriend today!"
• "What!?—I don't have a boyfriend! I'm a guy, and I'm not gay!" I responded with exasperation. This girl was truly annoying. She simply giggled in response to my glare.
• "Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. But Toma is your friend, right? I've always seen you two together at school most of the time."
• "Why? Did you guys break up or something?"
• Once again, I shot her a glare. "I just told you, I don't have that kind of relationship with him."
• "Hahaha! Right. But is it okay that you guys are separated like this?"
• "It's not like we're joined at the hip; we have our own lives."
• I rolled my eyes at her, wondering why she couldn't stop herself from spouting annoying nonsense. "…Still, I hope to see you guys hanging out together again."
• "Why do you care so much about me and Toma, anyway?"
• Her grin took on an eerie quality. "I just like seeing you guys together. You remind me of an 'uke and seme' relationship."
• "And what does that mean?"
• "Oh, uhh, oh! The professor is already here. Let's not get too distracted." She conveniently changed the subject when the professor arrived, but I had lost interest in what she meant. It probably was something weird again.
• Xia was weird. As much as I wanted to avoid her, fate seemed to have other plans, as we were partnered up for a research paper that would take two months to complete. "Great, I'm stuck with you for a month," I muttered.
• "Hey, it's not like I wanted this to happen either," she retorted with a pout, giving me a sharp look.
• "Whatever. Let's just get things done before the deadline. It would be great if we finish it way ahead of time." That way, I wouldn't have to spend too much time with her.
• "Hmph, you're such a grumpy, rude jerk. No wonder you don't have many friends."
• "H-Hey! I have friends!" I defended myself.
• "Yeah, right. You had one, and you just pushed him out of your life." It was then that I realized she was referring to Toma. "If you'll excuse me, I'm off to my next class." With that, she left.
• Ah, the current class was finally over. I had intended to call out to Toma as I left the classroom. However, just before I could do so, I remembered that we were supposed to be leading separate lives for three whole months.
• Seeing Toma happily engaging with others made me… smile, albeit slightly.
• "I guess he's doing well without me," I murmured to myself before exiting the classroom.
• When I met up with Hino at the cafe we had agreed upon, he greeted me with a friendly smile. "Hey, dude!"
• I took a seat across from him. "You know, I'm still not used to seeing you with that haircut. It suits you, though."
• "Thanks. Although, this won't last long. I'm definitely going to grow it out again." He ran his fingers through his hair, seemingly dissatisfied with its current length.
• "Long hair makes you look like a girl, well, except for your face, which is kinda girly," I teased.
• "Are you implying that my face looks feminine?" He blushed a bit, but I ignored it.
• "Yep, but your body tells a different story. You're too tall and muscular for a girl."
• He chuckled. "You guys keep saying I look like a girl when I have long hair, but no one ever notices you."
• I raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
• "Well, there were times I noticed that you looked girly. You know, with your face and height, I realized you look way more girly than I am."
• "What on earth made you see me that way? I'm not girly!" I retorted, annoyed.
• "Hmm... let's think about it, shall we?" He asked with a smirk.
• "Alright, let's hear your 'analysis,'" I said, humoring him.
• "To start, let's talk about your face. How do you manage to maintain such smooth skin? How do you shave your mustache or beard?" He pointed out.
• "Uh, I don't... my face never grew a mustache or beard."
• "Haha! Well, I and probably some other guys grow a lot of facial hair. It's hard to keep it as smooth as yours. You're a pretty rare guy with that kind of complexion," he pointed out.
• Thinking about it, I did remember seeing Hino and Toma with facial hair before.
• "Next! What about the hair on your arms and legs? Is it the same as your face - practically non-existent?" I nodded, now understanding where he was going with this.
• I realized that men are generally supposed to be a bit hairier, aren't they? But...
• "And then there's your height! Sometimes I can't help but compare your height with the girls on campus. Some of them are even taller than you."
• "Yeah, your height is more like the average height for a girl and on the shorter side for a guy," he pointed out, framing me within a square shape he made with both thumbs and index fingers. "Lastly, when I imagine you with long hair, you could actually look quite pretty!"
• "Alright, alright, I get it now. I might look more feminine than you," I admitted.
• He laughed it off. "I didn't mean it that way. I just felt like sharing my observations about you."
• "You really enjoy observing and imagining things about people, don't you?" I noted, realizing that he had quite an imaginative mind. What was worse was that he had me questioning my masculinity now.
• "Okay, now that's over with, we should probably get started on the report." I tried to shift the conversation back to our task, and his bright demeanor returned.
• "Ugh, back to schoolwork," he grumbled. We began discussing our topic, but in the back of my mind, I couldn't help but ponder my own masculinity.
• Am I not... "manly" enough?