Chapter 37

• HAERA.
• I was lost for words, staring into the eyes of Alan as we both stood there in silence. He was the one waiting for me with a cool expression, waiting for me to absorb his words from earlier and to interpret it however I choose to. I had a lot of questions to ask him but my mouth just hung open and my head thoughtless. How did he know? How could he have figured it out when even Alpha Zachary had no idea and got deceived. "How did you know?" I finally was able to say looking into his eyes for an answer that explains it all. "Is that important right now? Aren't you supposed to think of how to get to him now? " "It is important. I need to know how his Beta knows and he doesn't." I insisted. He looked at me for a while before he sighed in resignation. "The signs were all over the place. You were the one who delivered his food and I saw you clearly. When you came the next day--" "Wait... the next day?" I tried to think of any chances that I visited the Alpha the next day but it was void. I didn't see him in private after that night. "I never came the next day." I said. "I know. The next day the person I first thought was you showed up, I was surprised to see the sash on her face because you didn't have it on the night before but I assumed you took my words serious and used the sash because of your face. And when she left, the Alpha told me she was his mate and that he met you when you delivered his food the day before. That day, I was as shocked as you when he announced the princess as his mate. That day, I saw you...I saw you run out. It was then that I knew." It was a lot to take in but he still laid it out in front of me. Then his eyes narrowed and angry lines appeared across his forehead. "I don't Know what she did to him but I don't like it. He knows it. He can see clearly that she's rotten but I don't know what's making him go through with this." I gulped a few more gallons of saliva down my throat. I was right after all. The princess had impersonated me and he believed because of something she did. The spell... "It's his duty as an Alpha to mark his Luna...or so he thinks." I said. "I don't like her." And I could tell. "What did you plan on doing before I caught you?" I shrugged. "I thought I had nothing to lose by coming to convince him but I guess I can't get through to him. He'll wonder why you're not here to stop me." "I'm not here...I wasn't here..." he said turning to leave. "What?" I called after him. "You never saw me here and that's why I wasn't able to stop you. I'm making a huge sacrifice here by letting you go in when I should be guarding his door. Don't blow it." He said and I watched as his figure retreated till he finally disappeared. I smiled when I realized what he just did. He was going to let me go in and talk to Alpha Zachary. I really couldn't blow it now and so I tiptoed back to the part of the hallway where the Alpha's room. When I got to his door, I stood in front of it to steady my beating heart. There's no telling what will happen when in there. He could either believe and he could or not but I was betting on the chance that he believes me. I was betting everything on it. With one last exhale, I turned the knob and stepped into the room. It wasn't locked and I didn't even plan on knocking anyway. Knocking would have given him a reason to question why I was there. The room was dimly lit...it reminded me of that night. The night we met and the night I thought I had met the man who would mean the whole world to me. I came to a conclusion that he liked rooms with dim lighting. It actually matched his personality as far as I knew. He wasn't dark...yet not light. He seemed to be the balance between light and darkness and it only drew me to him. He wasn't a pretender and he seemed to accept his dark and light parts. I haven't met either...I wasn't sure what I met that very first day when I looked into his eyes but it still warmed my heart. The room had a big bed with a large canopy as it stood in the middle of the room. My eyes swept across the room. It wa simple and befitting of am Alpha who came visiting. It took a moment before my eyes fell on the dark frame sprawled out on the bed. The scent of me came at me stronger and so I knew it was him on the bed. I trudged slowly to his side not knowing why I was so quiet about being in his room. I should let him know I'm here. I should wake him. I shouldn't have slipped in here like this. But those thoughts drowned away at seeing my mate sleeping so peacefully. I was pulled to him and I blamed it on that invincible bond between us, one we couldn't run away from. I wasn't sure if he was fast asleep or he was just resting but I didn't care. His face was turned to the side as he laid on his stomach. I walked closer and made a stop by the side of the bed, where his face was and then stared down at him. He was naked...from the top and covered by the duvet down below. I gulped watching the way his muscles of his back tightened with each breath he took in and out. He was ripped. I knew that when I saw him fight but seeing him upclose did crazy things to my senses. I've never felt that sort of attraction to anyone. I guess I wasn't meant to and I was still a virgin... untouched... waiting for my mate to come along and claim me as his own. My eyes left his naked body and to his face. He really was an embodiment of satisfaction. I didn't know what was pushing me to stay so close to him or to even consider looking at him that way when I should be getting this over with but I still stayed there to watch him sleep. I crouched to his level and watched the slight flutters of his lashes in his sleep. The sight was beautiful. The sight was mine. The sight should be mine. As he slept, I could feel the air of mystery and flowed about him. That mysteriousness makes me more drawn to him. He hardly talked at the dinners with the family and he ate little. I never know what he's thinking or what is going on in his mind because he never even looks like he's thinking. He's just...he's just there. Being this close to him radiated some sort of waves inside of me. I didn't know what made me have the guts to do it but I did it. I just wanted to feel his face. Just to feel his face against my hands. Slolwy, I brought my hands to to his face. I paused mid air, hesitating that this might wake him cause seeing him that way, I didn't think I wanted to wake him anymore. All the things I had in mind to say seemed to have flown out the window. When I saw that he didn't move and his eyes didn't even twitch, I brought the hand down to caress his face slightly. It was rough and this skin wasn't as soft as mine when I rub my fingers down the length of his face. He was way too good-looking for me to resist. Maybe that was why the princess did it? Or was it just about his position as the Alpha of the strongest pack. I wonder what he thinks of when he looks at her. I wonder if she makes him smile because he hardly ever smiles. I wonder if he even knows her. Or if he senses something strange. I felt bad for how vulnerable he still was even after becoming the Alpha of the pack. I sighed... realizing I couldn't go through with my plans of coming there. I didn't know how to. I spent minutes admiring him when I should have just told him what I came to tell him. He seemed like much of a deep sleeper. I finally stopped touching his face and made to get up from my crouching position. I didn't fully make it up when his hand grabbed me. I gasped, eyes widening on fear as he pulled me back. "Were you going to leave without saying hi?" His deep groggy voice, thick with sleep came through my ears. My mouth almost watered at how he sounded. I tried to jerk myself away from him but he wouldn't have it. His grip was strong around my wrist. "Is something wrong? You've been here for a few minutes now and said nothing...I sniffed your scent and it was much stronger than the last few days." My face lit up. I was right. He could still smell my scent. But he obviously doesn't know it's me. The dim light and him just waking up from his sleep probably didn't make him see my clothe. Whatever, I just need to free myself of his hold. I didn't think I could do it anymore. He didn't let me go even I tried again, instead, he pulled me with my hand onto the bed with him and I fell with no restraint on the soft bed while he rolled on top for me. I shut my eyes tight. This same position...he's had me in it before and the feeling and thought of it was overwhelming. "Ilvira...why did you come into my---" His words got lodged back into his throat. I slowly opened my eyes and saw the way his eyes turned dark as he looked down at me. Anger as well as confusion flashed in his eyes and I was unable to tell which one finally took over when he growled like the thunderous sound of thunder on top of me; "You."