Chapter 4

• CRYSTAL.
• "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you..."
• Our voices filled the tiny apartment. It was off-key and uneven, but full of effort.
• Jason’s little hands clapped with excitement as he stared at the cake on the table like it was a miracle.
• It was barely a cake.
• A small, lopsided one, bought cheap from the corner bakery. The frosting was cracked, the candle bent. But to him, it was magic.
• And to me… it was enough.
• He grinned up at me, his teeth flashing through the crooked smile he got from me. “Mommy, look! My name’s on it!”
• I swallowed hard, forcing the lump in my throat down. “Of course it is, sweetheart. You’re the birthday boy.”
• “Come on, buddy, make a wish!” Noah said, leaning closer to Jason with a grin big enough for both of them.
• He had the kind of excitement a father would.
• He wasn’t Jason’s father, but sometimes I forgot that.
• He’d been there for every fever, every hospital run, every time Jason collapsed mid-play.
• Noah had been my lifeline for the past three years now. He was more than even a brother to me.
• If there was ever a man God sent to stand in for the broken ones, it was Noah.
• He'd given me more help than I ever deserved, taken Jason as his own son, picked him up from school sometimes when I was too busy to, bought him clothes from the thrift store, carried him when he couldn't walk for too long, and lost his breath... God. What more could I ask for?
• Jason squeezed his eyes shut, made a wish, and blew out the candle.
• We clapped, cheered, and pretended for a second that we weren’t drowning.
• Noah lifted Jason off the chair, spinning him gently in the air. “Four years old already? You’re getting big, champ.”
• We didn't really believe in the crowd. Jason, Noah, and Karla, Jason's friend who lives down the street, always made the perfect crowd.
• Jason giggled, breathless and happy. “Uncle Noah, I’m almost as tall as you!”
• I smiled, but my hands were shaking as I wiped the frosting off the knife. That small cake cost half of what I made in a week. The rent was already due. The hospital bill was piling up. And now, Kristy had threatened to take seventy percent of my next salary.
• But Jason didn’t know any of that.
• He just saw balloons taped to the wall and a candle with his name on it.
• He didn’t know that I’d skipped lunch all week to buy that candle.
• "Thank you, Noah," I hugged him, as I fought the tears that threatened to fall.
• ***
• When the laughter faded, Noah turned to me. “Hey,” he said softly. “Come outside for a second.”
• I hesitated, then nodded. We left Jason and his little friend Karla to wrestle over who got the biggest slice.
• There wasn't even any music for them to dance to. God, I was pathetic.
• "What did Kristy say?" He whispered, his kind, hazel eyes searching mine worriedly.
• I looked away. “She threatened to have me arrested.” My voice cracked before I could stop it. “She said management can’t loan me any more money.”
• He exhaled slowly, dragging a hand through his blonde hair. “God.”
• “Yeah,” I muttered. “God.”
• He paced a few steps, hands on his hips. “Crystal, he needs that surgery. We both know it. The doctor said...”
• “I know what the doctor said!” I snapped, then instantly regretted it. My voice softened. “I know, Noah. I just… I don’t know what else to do.”
• He turned back to me, and I saw how tight his face was with worry. “What do we do then? The surgery costs more than we’d make in two lifetimes. You’re barely eating, and I’m working double shifts, and it’s still not enough.”
• My gaze rested on his worried face, and I felt like pulling him in for a warm hug... The kind I'd never given to any other man except Jaden. But I just couldn't.
• Noah's worry over my child pricks my heart each time.
• Sometimes I wondered if he saw me as a friend or as a burden he couldn’t walk away from.
• He'd spent his savings and daily earnings on Jason. And at some point, I feel guilty about it.
• He was just a deliveryman. How much does he even make?
• "You have to stop. Stop worrying. I'll come up with something," I placed a hand on his shoulder, "You've worried enough about us."
• He shook his head, taking a step closer. “You both are my family. It’s not about worry. It’s about not standing by while...”
• He stopped himself and sighed, rubbing his face. “Look, I have some savings. Not much, but we could take him to the doctor tomorrow. Maybe there’s another option — medicine, a temporary treatment, anything to buy us a few weeks.”
• I gave a small, hopeless laugh. “It’s CHD we’re talking about, sunshine.” My voice softened at the nickname I was used to calling him. “Nothing can fix a hole in the heart except surgery.”
• “I know,” he whispered. “But we have to try. You never know what tomorrow might bring.”
• I looked at him, and something inside me trembled. The way he said it, the quiet desperation behind it, the unspoken 'I can’t lose either of you.:
• He leaned in too close, and I felt my heart picking up speed.
• But before I could push him away, we heard Jason's little voice from behind us.
• "Uncle Noah? Can I get the toy car we saw down the road the other day as a birthday present?"
• We quickly pulled away.
• "Uhm... Yes. Of course, buddy. Let's go get it now." Noah said awkwardly with his hands on his waist.
• “No, you shouldn’t,” I said quickly, clearing my throat. “He already got you a gift. It’s not polite to ask for another one.”
• Jason pouted, looking between us. “Please, Mommy?”
• “Noah,” I started, shaking my head.
• “It’s fine,” he cut in gently. “I’ll buy it for him. Come on, champ.”
• Jason cheered. “Karla! Let’s go!”
• Three of them jumped happily as they walked away.
• Jason’s small hand was tucked in Noah’s. Karla skipped ahead, and Noah turned back once to flash me that same smile that said 'don’t worry, I’ve got him.'
• I smiled weakly and waved. “Don’t jump too much, honey!” I called after them, but they were already gone.
• I leaned against the doorframe, pressing a hand to my chest. My heart was pounding too hard.
• The fear was always there for every time he ran, or every time he laughed too hard.
• Because I never knew which breath would be his last.
• ***
• I checked the time again.
• 8:42 p.m.
• They’d been gone for almost an hour.
• My fingers worried the hem of my shirt as I cleaned up the kitchen, stacking the chipped plates one by one. I told myself not to panic — they’d just gone down the street. Jason probably convinced Noah to buy him ice cream, too.
• Still, my heart wouldn’t settle.
• I picked up Jason’s toy truck from the couch and placed it gently on the table.
• I smiled weakly at it, trying to push down the knot of unease forming in my stomach.
• He’d be fine. Noah would never let anything happen to him.
• Right?
• My thoughts scattered when a soft knock came at the door.
• I froze mid-step.
• A second knock followed.
• I frowned. “Noah?”
• No answer.
• I tried to shake off the tension crawling up my spine. It was probably them trying to mess with me. Noah had done that once before — pretending to be a stranger until Jason gave them away with giggles.
• “Very funny,” I muttered, wiping my hands on a towel as I walked toward the door.
• Another louder knock came. And this time, it wasn’t playful.
• My pulse quickened. For a second, I considered peeking through the window — but I stopped myself. It had to be them. Who else would come here? No one else even knew where I lived.
• I forced a smile, “You two think you’re so smart, don’t you?”
• My hand reached for the doorknob and twisted it open. The hinges creaked as the door swung open.
• And then… just like that, the air left my lungs. And the towel slipped from my hand.
• I couldn’t breathe.
• I couldn’t even blink.
• Because standing there, tall, immaculate, and larger than life, was the one man I’d spent four years trying to erase from memory.
• The one man I'd do anything to keep away from our lives.
• Jaden Astor.