Chapter 103

• I felt the urge to touch her so I grabbed her from the waist and pulled her closer to me. Her smell, Fuck.. She’s making me go insane. I teased her and saw she was blushing. I felt my heart was happy because of her but suddenly my mind showed me my parents’ images and I felt the pain of losing them. It was all because of this woman… I shouldn’t love her. I should just hate her. With those thoughts I pushed her away and I saw she was looking at me with a hurt look, my heart ached but I didn’t care. Then grabbed her from her hand in a painful way and told hurtful words to her.
• She looked at me with tear filled eyes and the look she gave me was so innocent. How did I become this heartless to hurt the woman that I loved the most? I couldn’t understand myself. No.. she deserved this. She should feel the pain. I lost my parents because of her and I hate her so I’m giving the pain that she deserves. I can’t give her that pain in the same way I felt but I will give it to her in a more dangerous way. I knew I’m using her own love that she had for me to hurt her and I was satisfied. Then I dragged her into the washroom and pushed her against the wall as I turned on the ice cold water. I looked at her small body as she covered herself from her hands. Suddenly, she looked at me. Her eyes were empty and I could feel that she’s crying but I couldn’t see her tears because of the water. I felt like someone was piercing my heart with a dagger because of the empty look that she gave me. I was hurt. So I didn’t want to see her eyes anymore. So I just left without even looking back at her but before I left the washroom I warned her again.
• After I came into my room, my mind was a mess and my heart hurt. I wanted to forget so I went into the washroom and showered. Then I came out and changed my clothes but I couldn’t forget Delilah’s face. Shit. I sat on my bed and started to pull my hair because I wanted to feel the pain. I again hurt her. I betrayed my own feelings and hurt her again. My mind kept reminding me how she smiled at me. Fuck. I cursed and went out of my room because I wanted to check on Delilah but the thing I saw broke my heart even more. She was shivering and walking slowly through the staircase. I looked at her legs and I could tell they were numb. Is this what she gets for loving me? I closed my eyes and asked myself because of the pain I’m feeling inside of me.