Chapter 1795 A Big Man With A Big Cock:>Ep9

• I don't hate women. I'm not a misogynist. Yes, I know what that word means. But it's true that in this line of work I do run across a few I don't exactly hold in high regard. My mother, rest her soul, was practically a saint. If I believed in angels and all that shit I'm sure she'd be there. It was just me and her until she died young. Then I lied about my age and got the Army to take care of me for three years while I finished growing up.
• Uncle Sam taught me I didn't much enjoy taking shit from pinheads. Really, my mother was the only person who could get me to do something I didn't want to do. The only thing I've got against her, outside of dying on me when I was 16, is that when she named me Richard it never even crossed her mind what kids would do with that. She was innocent like that. She couldn't have known how I'd grow into that name, either. At least probably she didn't know. Did I get my size from my father? I don't know. Never met the man. She told me my father was Superman, and he was never around because he was out fighting bad guys. For a couple of years growing up, I even believed it.
• Outside of my mother, the other good woman in my life is Velma. She's my right hand. While I'm out getting into trouble she holds down the office, pre-screening clients, collecting information, keeping me organized, and dodging the occasional bill collector. I wish I could pay her more. She puts up with my shit. She gets me. She knows I fuck half our clients and she doesn't care. Velma's one of the good ones, but she plays for the other team. She and I actually fucked once years ago when we were both drunk. She says that was the night she swore off dick forever.