Brian gets off the phone and just thinks, how this is tearing his life apart. He feels terrible that all this is taking place, and it's his fault. He just wishes, she would open up and talk to him, tell him what is going on inside of her. Instead of closing him off. They talked about not doing this, about always being open, and now she was doing it to him. He knew something more was bothering her. He just wasn’t sure what it was? Yes, him thinking about being with someone else was top on the list, but there was more. He was at a loss, and this separation wasn’t doing either of them any good. Just pushing them further apart from each other. His main fear is the more away from each other, they stayed they would never be able to get what they had back.
Then he thought about what Monica said to him, about her worried he would get fed up and leave. Maybe that was still on her mind? And with him doing this, would just make her feel, in the future even if not now that he would. Just bringing her even more fears then she had. Making him finally realize just how much damage this has done to her and their relationship. That it just wasn't a mistake on his part, that it was something she feared all along. Now putting himself in her shoes, he saw how hurt she is, and what she could be going through. How even thinking about being with someone else, little alone, trying, is tearing her apart.
He was going to try to do everything he could to get her to open back up to him. To show her that he was there and not planning on going anywhere. He also felt that had to be another reason, she was so upset. Feeling he wanted out of this relationship when that was further from the truth. He just knew a lot of what he told her, especially the first night, she didn't even take in being so upset.
All she saw was betrayal, and him wanting out. Which wasn't how he felt. He was also trying to stay calm and not flip out as he has in the past. He was trying to go back to the person she first met that would listen and work through this. Showing her, he can be that person again and wanted to be. Just currently at times, it was taking everything he had not to flip out. He knew the fight they had a few days before she left, didn't help as he couldn't keep his composer, he was so at a loss, he just let it go.
It also confused him, why she would say she trusted him and even agreed to remarry him if she was feeling this way? Did she really trust him? Did she just say that but why? She didn't throw him out or even ask him to leave. She just went cold, which in a way, was worse. Then he knew, things just couldn't go back to normal like that. She would feel all kinds of things. It was just something he would have to deal with. Hoping he could make it better.
He knew to show up looking like Zach, should help him get into her graces at least a little bit. He knew how she felt about Zach, and if it wasn't for him, they probably wouldn't have met. If Zach didn’t work, he knew, he had a bigger problem. He was going to use anything he could, to get her to open up. He just hoped it worked and when he would show up she didn’t tell him to leave, making a scene. Monica would be pissed if they did. The person throwing this dedication wouldn't be very happy either. This was work, not time to make their personal life take center stage.