Chapter 42 It's Me

• I was pacing back and forth, biting on my nails, which is one of my mannerisms whenever I'm having a terror onslaught. I stopped and then looked up at the clock to see the time. It's already past midnight. He was gone for about twelve hours, and he hasn't come back yet. Every second I checked the windows, expecting he would go home any minute, but not a single strand of his hair was shown to my disheartenment.
• I heaved a deep sighed then closed my eyes, trying to calm my mind. I know panicking wouldn't be helped, but I can't help it. He told me not to do anything stupid, such as following him. It's tempting, but it's been hours. I haven't slept or eaten anything since this morning. I was going off the deep end. I shuddered and then looked for the remote. I should try to entertain myself. Maybe watching some television would ease my nervousness. I inhaled the stress, then let it all out. I sat down on the couch, turning on the television.
• Don't look at the clock, Natasha. Don't think of anything that has negative energy. Think of something that will boost your serotonin. I squeezed my brain, but my shoulder dropped when I realized Ethan was my source of emotional state. My vision blurred with tears, but I shook them away. I have no one aside from Ethan. I chuckled to myself. Why did I forget about it? I live alone. I have no friends, no parents…only Ethan.