Chapter 3

• As always Seyah was controlling it while biting her lips. Suddenly she lowered her head as she walked away. I looked at her as she disappeared from my sight. My heart was telling me to go and tell her that I won’t go with Eliza but I refused to do it.
• “Seth. Mmmm..can we stay at my place tonight? My parents are not at home today.” I looked at Eliza and saw she was blushing. I knew what she was talking about. She was just inviting me to have sex with her. I really felt disgusted.
• “No” with that I left. Eliza tried to say something but I ignored her.
• At lunch time, I saw Eliza talking with a few boys so I quickly went to the canteen before she saw me. If she saw me she would definitely try to be with me. I really don’t like it and all I wanted was to see Seyah. I didn’t see Seyah having her lunch so I went to her friend and asked if she knew where Seyah was and said that Seyah was in the music room so I quickly went to see her.
• I saw my sister was just staring out of the window while playing a violin. I really felt sad to see her like this because I knew it was all because of me.
• “Seyah..” I spoke as she turned to me. She smiled with me and then continued playing her violin.
• “Seth, could you play the piano for me?” Seyah suddenly spoke as she looked at me with a smile.
• “Yes.” With that I sat in front of the piano as I started to play her favorite music. She smiled and listened to it very carefully. After I stopped she stood up and came to me. I also stood and smiled at her but suddenly Seyah grabbed me from my collar and kissed me...........
• My whole body went numb as her soft lips pressed against mine. My heart was beating so damn fast. My sister was just kissing me and I also like it, I couldn’t understand what happened and why. I was just standing and I didn’t even move. Seyah was a lot shorter than me. Her height was about five feet and six inches, so she grabbed me down by my collar and kissed me. Every type of emotions surged to my mind but I was really scared, scared as fuck, my mind was pushing me to kiss her back but I couldn’t even move because I was stunned by her actions. I just became fucking dumb...Urgh. I slowly looked at Seyah. She was just pressing her cherry lips against mine, she didn’t even know how to kiss because this is her first kiss and also my first kiss too. I was looking at Seyah, her eyes were closed while she was licking my lips.. I didn’t want to do this.. and what is this?... She's my sister... Suddenly Seyah bit my lower lip, that little action made me lose every bit of rationality.
• So I placed my hand on waist and pulled her closer to me then I placed my other hand behind her head as I deepened the kiss, Seyah quickly wrapped her arms around my neck. I’ve already lost my sanity so the only thing I focus on is the kiss. Seyah pushed me and made me sit down on the stool I sat before then she climbed to my lap and sat down. I pushed my tongue into Seyah’s mouth and kissed her so passionately, Seyah’s fingers were travelling through my hair and it felt so good but suddenly I remembered what I’m doing.... what the fuck? She’s my SISTER... With that I pulled away from the kiss while our saliva was connecting with each other. I looked at Seyah. She was staring at me with her big bright eyes then I looked at her lips. They just became more red because of my actions.
• “Wh...what are you doing?” I asked Seyah as I put her down from my lap, her eyes filled with something weird...
• “I love you Seth. Please just don’t go with Eliza.” My body froze again because of her words, I stayed silent for a few minutes before speaking.
• “No..Seyah we can’t be like this, I’m your brother and I’m going with her today.” With that I left the music room.
• After school was over I waited for Seyah and after a few minutes she came out. She didn’t even look at me the whole time she was looking down. Urgh.. As soon as we entered the house Seyah ran to her room. I know I’m doing something that could hurt her but I can’t hurt her more so I should just let her forget those feelings.....FUCK why our life became like this?
• .....................
• - Seyah -
• I ran into my room and locked the door. I don’t want him to go tonight. How? He even agreed with her to watch a movie but why? Did he want to hurt me because I said that I love him? So many questions are killing me. I hate Eliza and she also hates me and Seth knows it very well but he still agreed with her instead of me. It really hurts to believe that he agreed to go out with a girl. I don’t know what happened to me. I just kissed him, my emotions took over me so I kissed him. I know that he’s my brother but I do have romantic feelings for him. I have no idea why that happened..... but he also kissed me back as he pulled me closer to him and again pushed me away.
• Actually it felt so good to kiss him and I always wanted to do that. I always wanted to be his first kiss, finally I did it but I’m still crying because he agreed with Eliza. I never liked to argue with Seth. I always listened to him so I didn’t want him to feel that I’m disobeying him. I just don’t understand why this thing happened to me, he was my own brother. I forced myself to forget about it and I went to bathroom, I showered and changed into comfortable clothes then I looked at the time and it was 5.00 p.m. Seth is going to meet Eliza....my heart hurts because I don’t want him to be with other girls but I actually can’t stop him. I waited because I knew that he would definitely go even if I begged him not to go. At 5.30 p.m I heard someone knocking at my door, I knew it’s Seth.
• “Seyah...I’m going now. I made dinner for you. Eat and sleep early, I'll be late so don’t wait for me.” My heart shattered into pieces as he said those words. He’ll be late? Is he going to sleep with that bitch? Really Seth? Why is he hurting me? My tears came out, I really didn’t want to talk to him because he knew my feelings yet he’s going to be with another woman so that means he doesn’t even like me right? I didn’t reply to him because I was just crying. It hurts to think that he’s going to be with that Eliza tonight. I don’t want him to go but how am I supposed to stop him? He will definitely go so I decided to stay silent.
• “Seyah?” Seth spoke again.
• “Alright then I’m going.” With that he left. I heard his footsteps as they faded. So he left.. I don’t know how to reduce the pain in my heart. I really don’t know. Suddenly I started to cry loudly. I just want him and I love him. Why can’t he just understand it? I know.. I know that we are brother and sister but I can’t forget and I love him. I don’t know what’s on his mind but in my mind I just love him so much. It’s been 10 minutes since Seth left so I quickly came out of my room and ran out. I don’t want him to go, I should just stop him. I couldn’t actually find him. I remembered Eliza said that she wanted to watch a movie so I quickly ran to the theatre and it was already 5.55 p.m.
• My whole body froze.... it was Eliza and Seth.
• Eliza’s arm was wrapped around Seth’s arm and Eliza was smiling so happily just like she won the world but the most painful thing was seeing Seth’s smile. He was smiling at Eliza too. I watched them as I stood there like an idiot. Suddenly Eliza kissed Seth’s cheek. My tears rolled down as I watched their movements. I don’t know why my heart hurts so much. It really hurts, I never thought my feelings for him would hurt me this much. I really wanted to die. They left and entered the hall, I looked at the advertisement board and they’re going to watch beauty and beast.. really? I just laughed at myself. There were no words to explain my pain. I didn’t want to see them together so I went home. I went to the dining room and I saw Seth had made food for me and there was a note too.