Chapter 8

• “What the fuck, Jericho?!” I pushed him away as he tried to kiss me in front of the public again. Jesus! When will this playboy learn? I’m not interested anymore! My goodness!
• He still managed to smirk even after seeing my disgusted look on my face. “Okay then, Baby. We’ll take it slow.” He beamed and I almost puked at his remark.
• “What slow, you ass? I don’t want to get back with you! What in the world in that freaking simple sentence can you not understand?” I asked, fuming in anger. I swear one more word from him and I am punching his face right here, right now. I don’t care if his fan girls attack me and kill me spot on.
• He raised his brow at me and cocked his head to the side. “What’s the problem, Ashejan? Why are you so mad?” He exasperated. “You don’t shout at people like this even though they irritate you so much.” He pointed out and I sighed heavily.
• I know! I know I’m not acting myself today. I don’t really know why I am so affected that Knight blatantly ignored me in the restaurant last night. I got annoyed that he didn’t even acknowledge me.
• I want to know what he’s thinking but he’s being so distant. In class, he would not talk. Not that he really talks but it bothers me more right now because I know that he saw me in the restaurant and he’s being quiet about it.
• He should at least tell me that he saw me with someone.
• Ugh!
• I don’t even know why I am this desperate to know what he’s thinking. I don’t really care of how others think of me. I want to know if he still thinks of me as an ordinary girl who loves to study and who has a supportive and strong best friend.
• I want to know if he thinks of me differently now.
• I don’t know why I feel that his opinion is the most important thing in the world.
• And I am frustrated even more because I see him talking to with Serena Narvasa right now. She’s the top in our class and she wears these eyeglasses making her look like a big nerd.
• He’s smiling really widely and I am not liking the feeling that’s forming into my gut. I want to call him and tell him we’ll eat at Brooklyn right now. All on me. My treat. Just don’t talk to her.
• I don’t really like how she smiles at him. I know that she has the dibs for him. She’s got the hots for him! I know that because I’m sort of a dating expert as of now.
• I shut my eyes and turned my eyes on Jericho. “Please. Just leave me alone for now, please.” I sounded really pathetic and I am begging him to get out of my sight.
• I saw him look at me in concern. One of the rare times that he shows those sparkles in his eyes. “Okay.” He sighed but he’s still looking at me.
• He motioned to hold my hand but I shook my head. No. Don’t touch me.
• Not when Knight is around.
• “Okay. I’ll leave you alone if that’s what you want.” He told me in a soft voice. “Just call me when you need me.”
• I nodded and watched him walk away from me.
• I’m hearing some murmurs around and they’re all probably thinking that I am a stupid girl for pushing Jericho, the man who has a long list of fan girls who want to get to his pants, away.
• I am.
• I sighed and sat in front of Genina who just looked at me. “You okay?” She asked.
• I sighed again and nodded. “I’m fine.” I replied then my eyes darted at Knight and Serena’s place. I’m really pissed. Knight always goes to the library at lunch because he loves to study more than make friends. He told me that. So, I’m really wondering if he likes Serena to come with her for lunch.
• Why do I feel so insulted? If he wanted some company to eat lunch, he could just tell me. I’m the first person he knew in here! I ate breakfast with him on his first school day!
• I feel so confused. I don’t want him near me because I don’t want others to know that he’s associated with me at some point but I don’t want to see him with others as well.
• Holy shit, Ashejan! You’re not falling for that man. Stop this crazy shit.
• “You don’t look okay.” I heard Genina comment as she looked at me in concern.
• I sighed once again. “I am.” I insisted. “I’m just thinking of some stuff.” I told her.
• She raised her brow. “Stuffs like?” She asked. “Like why Knighton Javier is eating with Serena the brainiac?”
• I narrowed my eyes on her and she shrugged.
• “I don’t know, Ash. But the way you look at him is really different.” She told me. I gave her a look. “Don’t start this conversation, Genina.” I told her curtly.
• She sighed. “Look, I’m just stating the obvious.” She started. “You look like you’re about to kill Serena at the way you stare at her when she smiles at Knight. I get it, Ashejan. You don’t have to hide it from me.”
• “I don’t like him.”
• “I didn’t say you do.” She replied and I looked at her. “But you’re obviously jealous.” She pointed out.
• “I am not.” Come on, Ashejan. Deny more. The more you deny, the more you’ll think of it.
• She chuckled. “I’ve known you almost all my life, Ashejan. I know how you look when you’re jealous. I know how you look when you’re pissed.”
• I sighed once again. “Fuck, no. I am not falling for this guy.” I said, shaking my head.
• She looked at me. “You can’t help it.” She spoke.
• “This is the thing with me. I fall too easily then they break me as easily as I fell for them. I don’t want this, G. I don’t want to fall then break again.”
• Genina looked at me and smiled. “You’ll never know if you’re going to break if you don’t fall, Ash.” She told me. “You’re a very strong woman because you have your shots in love and you got through every single heartache. I bet not everyone can still live after that.” She continued.
• I looked at her and nodded. This is my best friend. She always says the right things.
• “And if it’s a consolation, your exes are starting to come back to you.” She winked.
• I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I glanced at Knight and Serena once again. They’re laughing together. I couldn’t do anything but sigh.
• Oh, Ashejan, when will you stop falling?
• --
• “See you tomorrow, Ash!” Genina waved at me as she walked to the opposite direction.
• I walked to the bus stop and waited for the bus so I could hurry home and finish the darn Arts project. I am not good in drawing that’s why I have to do it now in case I have to change my piece several times. Or maybe I should just ask my sister, Asher, to do it for me since she’s really good at painting.
• I looked at my watch and it’s almost six o’clock. I sighed and tapped my foot as my arms are crossed across my chest. My goodness! Why is the bus taking so long to come here?
• I stopped tapping when I saw Knight coming my way. I stood properly but my shoulders sank when I saw Serena with him. They’re talking about something funny, probably, because they are laughing together while walking side by side.
• For a second, I wished I’d evaporate right now. I don’t want them to see me.
• Knight stopped for a second when he saw me looking at them. He didn’t even smile at me and he continued to talk to this brainiac.
• I took a very deep breath and pursed my lips in a thin line, trying to contain my cool.
• They walked beside me and I can overhear their conversation. They’re talking about NASA’s newly launched satellite and it really makes me speechless.
• So, Knight likes those kinds of conversations? Do I have to do a research on the asteroids and comets so that I could hear him laugh with me like that?
• Oh, God! I’m fucking jealous and it’s insane.
• I can’t be jealous. I’m just someone he met first. It’s not like I imprinted something on him to fall for me right away. Though I wished I did.
• I was relieved when the bus arrived and I hopped in. It’s not full so I could sit wherever I want. Knight and Serena hopped in as well and I plugged my earphones on. I don’t want to hear their laughs inside the bus. Please. I think my heart is going to explode.
• They are sitting behind me – just freaking behind me – and it’s making me annoyed even more. Why would they sit behind me? There are a lot of empty seats!
• Not long after, Serena stood up. It’s her stop. I looked at her as she waved her hand enthusiastically for Knight as the bus moved.
• I shut my eyes and tried my best to not roll them at her.
• I removed my earphones and placed my iPod inside my bag. No need to use them because Knight won’t be laughing anymore since his mate has gotten off.
• Ten minutes later and it’s our stop. I walked out of the bus first and walked ahead. I was contemplating on whether I would wait for Knight or not. I choose not.
• What the hell, Ashejan! You’re acting like a jealous girlfriend.
• I really am. Only, I’m not a girlfriend.
• I can hear his footsteps behind me and I suddenly got the urge to look behind me and talk to him. Hell, I want to talk to him. I want to know what he’s thinking.
• “Good night.” I heard him speak as I stopped at our gate.
• I looked at him but he’s already walking towards their house. I bit my lip and stared at him for a minute. I didn’t open the gate not until I saw him walk inside their house.
• I sighed to myself and opened the gate. He’s two houses away from me and I can see his tall figure as he walked inside the door.
• I shut my eyes and breathed deeply.
• Damn, Ashejan. This is different. He’s different. It’s different.