Chapter 38 How Gargantua did eat up six pilgrims in a salad
The story requireth that we relate that which happened unto six pilgrims wh_ame from Sebastian near to Nantes, and who for shelter that night, bein_fraid of the enemy, had hid themselves in the garden upon the chichling peas,
among the cabbages and lettuces. Gargantua finding himself somewhat dry, aske_hether they could get any lettuce to make him a salad; and hearing that ther_ere the greatest and fairest in the country, for they were as great as plum-
trees or as walnut-trees, he would go thither himself, and brought thence i_is hand what he thought good, and withal carried away the six pilgrims, wh_ere in so great fear that they did not dare to speak nor cough.
Washing them, therefore, first at the fountain, the pilgrims said one t_nother softly, What shall we do? We are almost drowned here amongst thes_ettuce, shall we speak? But if we speak, he will kill us for spies. And, a_hey were thus deliberating what to do, Gargantua put them with the lettuc_nto a platter of the house, as large as the huge tun of the White Friars o_he Cistercian order; which done, with oil, vinegar, and salt, he ate them up,
to refresh himself a little before supper, and had already swallowed up fiv_f the pilgrims, the sixth being in the platter, totally hid under a lettuce,
except his bourdon or staff that appeared, and nothing else. Which Grangousie_eeing, said to Gargantua, I think that is the horn of a shell-snail, do no_at it. Why not? said Gargantua, they are good all this month: which he n_ooner said, but, drawing up the staff, and therewith taking up the pilgrim,
he ate him very well, then drank a terrible draught of excellent white wine.
The pilgrims, thus devoured, made shift to save themselves as well as the_ould, by withdrawing their bodies out of the reach of the grinders of hi_eeth, but could not escape from thinking they had been put in the lowes_ungeon of a prison. And when Gargantua whiffed the great draught, the_hought to have been drowned in his mouth, and the flood of wine had almos_arried them away into the gulf of his stomach. Nevertheless, skipping wit_heir bourdons, as St. Michael's palmers use to do, they sheltered themselve_rom the danger of that inundation under the banks of his teeth. But one o_hem by chance, groping or sounding the country with his staff, to try whethe_hey were in safety or no, struck hard against the cleft of a hollow tooth,
and hit the mandibulary sinew or nerve of the jaw, which put Gargantua to ver_reat pain, so that he began to cry for the rage that he felt. To ease himsel_herefore of his smarting ache, he called for his toothpicker, and rubbin_owards a young walnut-tree, where they lay skulking, unnestled you m_entlemen pilgrims.
For he caught one by the legs, another by the scrip, another by the pocket,
another by the scarf, another by the band of the breeches, and the poor fello_hat had hurt him with the bourdon, him he hooked to him by the codpiece,
which snatch nevertheless did him a great deal of good, for it pierced unt_im a pocky botch he had in the groin, which grievously tormented him eve_ince they were past Ancenis. The pilgrims, thus dislodged, ran away athwar_he plain a pretty fast pace, and the pain ceased, even just at the time whe_y Eudemon he was called to supper, for all was ready. I will go then, sai_e, and piss away my misfortune; which he did do in such a copious measure,
that the urine taking away the feet from the pilgrims, they were carried alon_ith the stream unto the bank of a tuft of trees. Upon which, as soon as the_ad taken footing, and that for their self-preservation they had run a littl_ut of the road, they on a sudden fell all six, except Fourniller, into a tra_hat had been made to take wolves by a train, out of which, nevertheless, the_scaped by the industry of the said Fourniller, who broke all the snares an_opes. Being gone from thence, they lay all the rest of that night in a lodg_ear unto Coudray, where they were comforted in their miseries by the graciou_ords of one of their company, called Sweer-to-go, who showed them that thi_dventure had been foretold by the prophet David, Psalm. Quum exsurgeren_omines in nos, forte vivos deglutissent nos; when we were eaten in the salad,
with salt, oil, and vinegar. Quum irasceretur furor eorum in nos, forsita_qua absorbuisset nos; when he drank the great draught. Torrentem pertransivi_nima nostra; when the stream of his water carried us to the thicket. Forsita_ertransisset anima nostra aquam intolerabilem; that is, the water of hi_rine, the flood whereof, cutting our way, took our feet from us. Benedictu_ominus qui non dedit nos in captionem dentibus eorum. Anima nostra sicu_asser erepta est de laqueo venantium; when we fell in the trap. Laqueu_ontritus est, by Fourniller, et nos liberati sumus. Adjutorium nostrum, &c.