Chapter 5

• Was this the fourth or fifth town she wondered as she unpacked her suitcase? She’d have to sit down and really think to be certain. The last year was a blur, each move meant a job that paid better and a place to stay for less rent, so it wasn’t a total loss.
• She always made sure she found a job where she was the only employee or could wear a name tag. Too many times she found out just how invisible to others she truly was when she’d arrive at work each day and have to explain who she was and why she was there. Too many jobs had also been lost that way. It was hard to keep going, but she had no choice. Reaching her goal meant she had to keep moving forward.
• She didn’t care if it took another four years, she was going home, with a completely new identity and a new life. It may not be the one she had dreamed of, but it was the one she wanted now.
• Being alone hadn’t gotten easier though. She’d tried to make friends, but friends generally remembered you after you walked away. The only good thing, she decided, was never having to go through good-byes and explanations filled with false words.
• Phinehas climbed into her suitcase and stretched out. Gracelyn laughed. “Is that your way of telling me we’re living in a suitcase or out of one?” The cat rested his chin on his paws and looked up at her with boredom in his eyes. “I know, me too. But at least here you have a balcony to sit out on. You can watch the birds.” She looked at the small area she had just mentioned. Okay, so it was only about five-by-three feet, but it was better than none. She reached over to him and scratched his head. “It’s not forever, Phin. Be a pal and pretend to like it here, okay?”
• ~
• She pulled the door down and secured the lock. Maybe she should have rented a bigger storage locker. No, that would be out of her budget. Turning around, she smiled at no one, just needed to. Two more months and I can go home!
• It had been close to five years now since she’d left, but she had done it! Walking quickly, she headed back to the tiny apartment where she and Phinehas lived now. She couldn’t wait to tell him the good news, not that he’d answer or even react, but telling someone was better than just being stuck inside her head.
• She slowed for a minute and opened her purse. After pulling out her wallet, she flipped it open and dug into the pocket to get her birth certificate. She ran her thumb over her name softly. Gracelyn Arianna Trainer. She put it back into the pocket and snapped it closed. She still couldn’t bring herself to throw it out, and she’d tried plenty of times.
• Taking a deep breath, she took out another birth certificate, her new one, and studied it. It was completely identical to the other one, except for the name. This little piece of paper had set her back almost three months in her finances, but it was required so she could go home. After tucking it back, she closed her wallet, stuffed it back in her purse, and started toward the apartment again.
• ~
• Standing in the empty apartment, she looked around it slowly, her new life would begin in two days, and now she was having anxiety attacks. The movers had taken everything from her storage locker and from her apartment and had loaded it up. They were scheduled to drop it off in two days’ time. It had been cheaper for her to share the big truck with another of their jobs, so she had two days to hop one bus to the second and then the third, to beat them there.
• Phinehas sat and looked at the cat carrier. She smirked and walked over to him. “Last time, I promise.” Bending down, she scratched him behind the ears. “We’ll be home in two days, and then we’ll throw it out, okay?” He mewed, and she was fairly certain if it had been words, they wouldn’t have been very pleasant ones.
• Slowly walking through the apartment, she made sure she had gotten all of the last-minute things like shampoo and that last cup and plate were packed in her bag. Excitement went through her when she thought of the little house she’d be living in two days from now. When she’d called and arranged the money transfer, they had been curious as to why she hadn’t come to see it in person. She couldn’t very well tell them that she’d walked by it every day on her way to school, could she? Or that she’d had picnics with one of their grandchildren in the pretty little backyard. And she knew if she did go see them in person, they wouldn’t remember her beyond that moment. This way, it was paid and signed for without problems. Reluctantly, they had agreed.
• Closing the backpack up, she stood and checked her watch. The cab would be here in a few minutes. “Come on, Phin, in you go.” He lied down on the floor. Sighing, she went over and scooped him up lovingly. “Our new life begins now.”